Jumping to Conclusions

In God we trust, all others we virus scan. ~Author Unknown

Dallas here.

You’d have thought the world was coming to an end.

My mama and grandmama were racing around the house, hollering accusations, and acting crazy.

If I’d been a bit younger, I’d have loved the commotion.

It started when Grandmama announced that one of her cleaning ladies had lifted a pair of her earrings.

And we’re not talking el-cheapo costume stuff either.

Of course, Grandmama had no proof of the theft, but she insisted the baubles weren’t where they were supposed to be. She said she’d tried them on a few months ago, and nobody had “borrowed” them, so it had to be the maid.

One of many maids, I might add, since getting one to stick around is akin to putting socks on a rooster.

So Grandmama scoured her room looking for them but found nothing.

She called Mama in on the search, but Mama didn’t find them either.

Then the Blame Game started.

Mama said Grandmama has too much junk and needs to periodically weed some of it out.

Grandmama tore apart one drawer before deeming it too much work.

Then Mama hinted that Grandmama had misplaced the earrings, and the ruckus got going good.

Grandmama said she wasn’t going in a home, and Mama said she didn’t mean that.

Then they started in on the cleaning gals — how hard it is to find a good one, how many folks can’t be trusted, and so on. I’ll bet the ears of those maids were burning good by this time!

Mama was calling on St. Anthony, finder of lost things, when Grandmama wondered aloud if she’d placed the earrings in her safe deposit box at the bank.

For safe keeping.

Mama didn’t remember taking them there, and neither did Grandmama.

But it was moot because the bank isn’t open on weekends.

So everybody spent a restless, sleepless two days.

Even me.

Because I’m a Sheltie, people, and I’m very sensitive to my mama’s moods.

By Monday, I was plumb exhausted and ready for a nice snoozle.

But not Mama.

She went to the bank first thing, and there in Grandmama’s safe deposit box were the earrings!

Imagine that.

Maybe next time they won’t be so quick to blame the help (but that’s always the first place to point at, isn’t it?)

Never say, “oops.” Always say, “Ah, interesting.” ~Author unknown