Please Let This End Soon

We’re into the second month of the year and I’m mentally exhausted. The release of EVERYTHING IS HORRIBLE NOW has been one disaster after another: what with design issues, shipping problems, missed orders, and multiple other fuckeries, both with the limited edition and the independent version.

If these many problems happened in such rapid succession to anyone else, I wouldn’t believe it. I’m honestly considering writing a nonfiction novella (maybe even a novel by the time this experience is in my rear-view) called EVERYTHING IS (REALLY) HORRIBLE NOW, but as previously stated, I don’t expect anyone would believe the chain of events. Suffice it to say, me and everyone involved with this project will be glad to have this book behind us.

And I still have the release of NO HOME FOR BOYS to look forward to in June…so yay…

Had this kinda thing happened to me last year, or any other year previous to 2018, I would’ve lost my shit and dug myself a hole to hide in. I’d be vague-posting and shit-stirring on social media in an attempt to take my mind off the bigger issues, which in turn would’ve caused more issues, and the cycle would have perpetuated. This time, though, I’m pretty chill. Tired, but chill, if you can dig it. I face every issue as it surfaces and because of that I’ve been able to maintain an even keel. This needs to end, though. And soon.

On top of all that, the fasting either isn’t working or I’d gained so much since my last visit that, if I did lose weight, it isn’t showing on the scales yet, because I’ve gained four pounds. I didn’t start this fasting business until January of this year, and hadn’t seen my doctor since October,so it’s very possible I simply gained a buttload of weight over the holidays. And no, I’m not working out, so it’s not a matter of new muscle weighing more than old fat. But, hey, even if the fasting isn’t working, at least my grocery bill is smaller.

I know I sound defeated but I’m truly not. I’m even smiling as I type this because I’m still in a good headspace. Especially since I’ve been dealing with and fixing the issues to the best of my ability, which happens to be sufficient. Who woulda thought? Also, I finally have a baseline set, so if I continue to gain weight, I’ll be able to tell when my next doctor’s appointment comes around in May. So all is not lost. At least not in my mind.

One more thing: after the last blog post my Patreon supporters damn near doubled in size, so thanks for that, you sexy so-and-sos. Really looking forward to sharing CRUELTY AND JOY with y’all.

I finished WALLFLOWER (Chad Lutzke) and THINNER (Stephen King writing as Richard Bachman) last week and loved both. WALLFLOWER hit some triggers of mine, but I managed to get through it with only a mild cause of crawling skin. This fourth readthrough of THINNER was my best experience with the book yet, and the first time I’ve ever walked away from it with a positive opinion. Hated it the last three times. Still trying to understand what changed in my life to make me appreciate it nowadays.

Finally, the rollercoaster that is Stephen King fandom reared its ugly head when his new novel, THE INSTITUTE, was announced last Thursday. I was stoked until I saw the cover reveal and read the excerpt on Friday. Looks like we’re getting YA King, and the last thing the world needs is YA King. But we’ll see. I wasn’t expecting to love THE OUTSIDER as much as I did, and now it’s in my top five. I’m apt to say that  I’ll likely love it based solely on the fact that it is not ELEVATION.

How are y’all doing? What’re you reading. Let me know below.

E.