“When the relationship failed, it felt like I had failed. Being...

“When the relationship failed, it felt like I had failed.  Being a good girlfriend had been so important to me, and I couldn’t succeed at the one thing I put all my energy into.  Admittedly I was a very codependent partner, which is something I’m working on. Even after we broke up, I still hung out with him all the time. He saw it as a casual thing, but I was still looking for the validation of being wanted. I felt so lost.  All of my life plans had been contingent on the relationship.  Finally I moved back to New York, which is where I grew up. At the time it seemed like giving up. I moved in with my parents. My confidence was low.  I didn’t think I’d be able to find a job.  I went through all the motions but I felt like I was faking it. There was a voice in my head telling me that I didn’t deserve any of the jobs I was applying for. But after months of searching, I just got hired last Friday.  I’m going to be a trauma therapist at a victims’ services agency. It’s exactly what I wanted to be doing with my degree. It feels like the start of something. And that’s exactly what I needed.  Before coming home, everything felt haunted and attached to him.  But up here, everything is completely mine: my job, my schedule, my surroundings.  Even coming to Grand Central is something I used to do as a kid, and I’m doing it now, and I’ll continue to do it.  It’s connected to my history.  And it’s a part of me.  And it has nothing to do with him.”