“Ten years ago I started a company. It wasn’t a unicorn or...

“Ten years ago I started a company.  It wasn’t a unicorn or anything, but after a few years it was worth a couple million dollars.  And that was enough for me.  I never wanted to be Bill Gates.  All I wanted was financial security.  And I thought I had achieved it.  We had a deal on the table.  It seemed like a sure thing.  It got so far along that I was sketching out my retirement.  But at the last moment it blew apart, and we never recovered.  Last Friday I called a personal bankruptcy attorney.  I haven’t even told my wife yet.  I want her to know the truth, but I don’t want to freak her out.  The stress is fucking killing me.  And I just turned sixty, so I’m grappling with the notion that I might not be employable.  After being successful for my whole life, suddenly I’m a failure.  But I’m trying not to let the dark side take over.  I’m fighting off suicidal thoughts.  I’m measuring my success by how well I can keep my humanity in the midst of this trauma.  If I can maintain respect for other people, it helps me feel better about myself.  So I’m trying not to snap at anyone.  I’m trying not to be vicious with my wife.  If I can’t be a successful person right now, at least I can be a good person.  And that’s a form of success.”