Indestructible…not
Alas, the indestructible dog frisbee does not exist.
Michael, our 2-year-old German Shepherd/Lab mix, bit right through the new frisbee I’d ordered from Amazon within the first hour of playing fetch. In its product listing, the manufacturer claimed that the frisbee was ‘indestructible,’ backing it up with a lifetime replacement guarantee.
With that kind of confidence in their product, I figured the company might have the frisbee we’ve been looking for ever since Michael demolished his first (and every succeeding frisbee) in the past two years.
Worse case, they could send me another frisbee…every week for the rest of Michael’s life.
What were they thinking?
I wondered if the company realized what it was promising. Given Michael’s appetite for frisbee play and destruction, he might bankrupt the manufacturer.
Long story short(er), by the second day, Michael had enlarged the small hole into a long tear along a third of the rim. The frisbee now wobbled badly when I threw it, and I renamed Michael “The Destructor,” which made me want to watch the original Ghostbusters movie that evening.
(If you’ve forgotten, the Ghostbusters are challenged to choose the shape of the Destructor as they battle the supernatural enemy in the final showdown of the movie. They end up with the Marshmallow Man. Michael is far from being supernatural, but he is definitely talented in the destruction department. I’ll never forget the day we came home from church after leaving our feisty puppy in his kennel with his dog bed. You really can’t appreciate how much stuffing goes into a dog bed until you find a kennel filled with shredded foam; we could hardly see Michael in his kennel thanks to all that released stuffing.)
Not the only tough dog on the Amazon block
Back to the frisbee.
I decided it was time to check out the guarantee, so I called customer service at Amazon, and I have to say, they were very helpful. Though Michael had played constantly and joyously with the toy since it had arrived, I opted not to receive a replacement. I didn’t want to spend my time chatting with a customer service rep every three days for the foreseeable future. I accepted the full refund, sadly acknowledging that the frisbee was not ‘indestructible’ as portrayed.
Of course, that’s when I finally took the time to read the customer reviews. Sure enough, Michael was not the only tough dog consumer. Other folks had posted about their own disappointment with the ‘indestructible’ frisbee. Though many wrote that the frisbee had lasted longer than others they had tried, the end of the story was always the same: another one bites the dust.
And that reminds me of seeing the movie Bohemian Rhapsody a few weeks ago. I’m still trying to get “Mama Mia! Mama Mia! Galileo! Galileo!” out of my head. Not having been a big Queen fan before, I hadn’t realized the band wrote the song “Another One Bites the Dust.”
But I know it now.
Man, do I know it now.
Every time I throw the not-indestructible frisbee and it flops onto the ground, “Another one bites the dust” plays in my head.
I can only hope it doesn’t hang around as long as “It’s a Small World” did after we took our kids to Disneyworld almost 30 YEARS ago.
Oh no, I can’t believe I just thought of that…
No!
NO!
“It’s a world of laughter, a world of……..”
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