Chapter 36 in the serialisation of the book 'Insurrection' 4th book in the 'Corpalism' series

36

We know what we are, but know not what we may be.
William Shakespeare

"Right, now everyone's here," said Gerry, "let's get straight down to business, are we all in?

He was deliberately not clarifying whether or not they were 'all in' to do the same thing. There was a brief silence, then general nods and grunts of agreement. "Ok, Alb, over to you mate."

Alb stood up, his back was aching but he wasn't about to show weakness, not when they were making progress at last, "First on the agenda, what are we going to call ourselves?"

He rushed on, like Gerry, not wanting the debate to start again, "we've got all the suggestions here and Gerry and I have identified the top ten favourites," he pointed at the A4 sheets Mags had stuck up on the walls, "all you need to do is write your name under your first choice."

There was a short silence as they digested this; then Wilf spoke for all of them, "Why do we have to write our names? I'd rather put a tick or a cross."

"I agree, no names, no pack drill," said Bill.

"What if someone puts more than one tick down?" said Alb, "That would confuse things a lot."

"No-one's going to do that," said Bill.

"But what if they do?" said Mags who had thought of the possibility in the first place, "You know, if they can't make up their minds."

"I'm just going to tick my favourite," said Wilf shuffling over to one of the sheets.

"Me too," said Bill.

The group moved up and down, staring at the A4 sheets and there was some dark muttering from some about it being the first time they'd seen the choices. It took much urging from Gerry and Alb, standing at people's shoulders and virtually pushing pen to paper in some cases, but finally each person had cast their vote. Mags took down all the sheets and started the count.

Alb grabbed one of the sheets, anxious to keep the momentum. "Right, that's 5 votes for 'NOD' as in 'Not too Old to make a Difference'," Cynthia's face went pink, that one was her idea. Alb snatched another sheet, "6 votes for ' Rebels with a Cause' or RC for short."

"As in arsey," Wilf added, leaving no doubt as to the originator of that one.

"Only 1 vote for 'People's Revolutionary Army'," That was Ron's; considered too red by everyone else. Alb flashed a look of commiseration at Harry before he announced, "2 votes for 'The Eden Village Hall Freedom Fighters'."

He shuffled the papers before handing them back to Mags, saying, "Nil points for the rest. However we do have a winner and by a big majority...with 15 votes, it is 'Pensioners Against Corruption and Tyranny'."

Alb was particularly taken with the acronym, P.A.C.T.

"That's 29 votes," said Mags her arms tightly folded in triumph.

"So what?" demanded Wilf.

"There are only 27 of us," stated Mags.

"What?" said Wilf looking around and making a quick head count, "Who the fuck voted twice?"

"I'm not going to say I told you so Wilfred," said Mags, "but....."

"What we gonna do then?" demanded Gerry.

"Vote again, I suppose," said Alb.

"There's no need for that," said Mags.

"Why not?" demanded Wilf, "If some people voted twice then we should vote again."

"Maybe they did vote twice, Wilfred," said Mags, "but even if you take 2 off the winning choice it still has 13 votes."

"But that's still not the majority," said Ken, "shouldn't we do an elimination thing, you know so it's truly fair. Like with Proportional Representation, we eliminate the one with the least votes then people who voted for that one get to vote again for their other favourite."

"I think Ken has a point," said Val.

"Well I don't," stated Alb keen to break up anything that included Ken and Val.

"Thank you Alb," said Mags coquettishly, slipping her arm possessively through his.

"Well I think we should vote again," said Harry, "I've changed my mind."

"What did you vote for?" demanded Wilf.

"I'm not telling you," said Harry, "it's a secret ballot."

"It's not a ballot, it's just a bloody name, that's all, just a vote for a name."

"We can't all vote again," said Gerry, "Just the ones who voted for the one with the least votes."

"Ok, that's People's Revolutionary Army', with 1 vote," stated Alb.

"Right," said Wilf forcefully, "Who voted for 'People's Revolutionary Army'?"

Three hands went up. "And me," said Harry.

"What the hell?" said Wilf, "It only got 1 vote. What are you lot playing at?"

Mags smiled, "We should've put our names, then we wouldn't have this mess."

"Mags had it right, 'P.A.C.T' got the most votes so it should be the first choice."

"But it might not win next time," objected Harry, "maybe people will change their minds and we'll get a new choice... like 'The Eden Village Hall Freedom Fighters'."

"Why do you have to turn everything into a competition?" Wilf was unreasonably angry.

"I don't," disputed Harry, "not everything."

"It's not about that," interrupted Alb, "It's about a name that represents us and what we stand for."

"You're only sayin' that because you suggested 'P.A.C.T'," said Harry.

"'P.A.C.T's' a good name," said Alb, "it says something, 'Pensioners Against Corrup....',"

"I'll vote for that," interrupted Wilf, bored with the process, "Then it'll have 14 votes, the majority."

"Yeah, but others might change their votes," said Harry.

"But they aren't going to, are they," said Wilf, "I mean 'P.A.C.T.' is the best name, isn't it."

"You didn't think so at first, Wilf," said Cynthia tartly, "because you voted for something else."

"Oh, hell's bells," hissed Wilf, "look, it's really simple, 'P.A.C.T' already has the most votes, so we go with first past the post, the one with the most votes."

"But it doesn't have the majority of votes," said Ken.

"It does," snapped Wilf, "the majority of us voted for it."

"Ken's right," said Val, "something as important as this should have an overall majority."

"As important as this?" said Wilf, "It's just a fuckin' name."

"No need to swear, Wilfred," said Fiona, giving Pete a hard stare.

"I think we should vote again," he responded dutifully.

"Me too," said Jonesey. Dave was nodding vigorously as were Dora and Fiona.

"Okay," said Alb taking control, "let's have a vote on whether we all vote again."

"A vote on whether we vote again?" questioned Reg.

"And this time put our names," said Esmé.

"But I don't want to put my name," said Bill.

"Why not?" asked Dave.

"I don't want anyone trying to pressure me to vote for a name I don't like," said Bill.

"What?" said Wilf. As if.

"I don't want anyone leaning on me to vote for their suggestion," said Bill.

"I agree with Bill," said Vera, "I think it should be a secret ballot."

"It's not a ballot," stated Wilf, "we're choosing a name, any old name to call ourselves, that's all."

"Well I think you're missing the point," snapped Cynthia, "it's not just a name, it's what people are going to call us. In the newspapers and on TV, in the streets and the pubs."

There were murmurs of agreement and some chests being pushed forward proudly at the thought of making the news.

She went on, buoyed by their support, "If we choose a stupid name we will be mocked but if we have a good name that represents what we are trying to achieve then we will get some respect."

Wilf buried his head in his hands.

"Alright then," said Alb, "so let's vote on it."

"Firstly we should vote on whether or not we want a new vote," said Mags, "show of hands please. If you think we all need to vote again then please raise your hands now." 18 arms were raised.

"That's a yes then," said Alb.

"And please raise your hands if you want a secret ballot," said Mags. 15 arms went up.

"That's yes again," said Alb.

Mags was in her element, "Next thing we need to vote on is whether or not we want one vote where the choice with most votes wins or do we want to follow the principles of Proportional Representation where the names with the least votes are discarded and we then vote again for our new favoured choice."

There were blank looks all round. Mags was undeterred.

"Raise your arms if you want highest votes wins," she cried. 20 arms went up."Right, all of you take one sheet of paper from this ream and looking at the choices around the room please write your favourite, then fold the sheet over and give it me."

There were groans that this entailed the need to move round the room. Reluctantly they wandered about and scribbled their thoughts on the paper. It took about fifteen minutes but eventually they had made their choices.

Mags did the calculations and then cleared her throat importantly. "Okay," she said, "1 vote for 'The Eden Village Hall Freedom Fighters'."

"Rats," said Harry.

Wilf grinned, he'd scared anybody off voting for that one, couldn't have stood it if Harry had won in the end.

"2 votes for 'People's Revolutionary Army'." Ron beamed, he'd gained another vote, "and 4 votes for 'N.O.D.'"

Cynthia crossed her arms and frowned heavily; she'd lost a vote and needed to know who had bailed on her.

Mags continued reading out the results and a warmth entered her voice, "7 votes for 'R.C.' and still, the number one choice with 13 votes," she looked over at Alb and smiled broadly, "we have Pensioners against Corruption and Tyranny ...'P.A.C.T'."
 
Cheers

Arun







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