Follow-up to yesterday's ramble…

Today has not been much kinder to me than yesterday was, so I spent a long time lying on the couch, unable to get up, but unable to go back to sleep. When I got up, I found two different blog posts on Twitter that come from paid writers, and they're talking about some of the same things I rambled on last night. They tackle the topics with more coherence, which I supposed is why they earn the big bucks. First, I got a link to a Slate article by Lionel Shriver. I got the link from Mari Adkins who said she read this and thought of me. So, that's a big time paid writer saying something similar to me, that we need to have unlikable characters sometimes. No, not all the time, just sometimes.

And then working on another tangent from the same ramble, I read a blog post from Neil Gaiman where he answers a fan who wonders how he feels about reading or watching the work of people that Neil doesn't personally agree with. Neil, with his usual style, answers that this would be cutting himself off from really good art. The part I want to quote is after his main answer:

(The sad flip-side is I've met people — writers and artists — over the years who I liked immediately, with whom I found myself agreeing on everything to do with art and aesthetics so closely that we might have shared the same head, people whose world-views were pretty much mine, whom I'd talk with far into the night and whom I parted from excited that I'd met them, looking forward to nothing more than reading their writing or looking at their art… and then I would find what they had done, and, at least as far as my taste was concerned, the books would be uninteresting, the drawings ugly or clumsy. And in an odd way, that hurts more than liking the work of someone who behaved badly, or thought in a way that I consider offensive or wrong.)

Which is exactly what I was talking about with books from writers I know being slightly more repulsive for my fear of not liking them and risking losing a friend. I mean, I think I know a few hundred writers now, and I'd guess that of those perhaps 30 have read me. I'm not one to point at the others and yell, "Slackers!" Why? Cause truth be told, I'm not in a rush to read writers I know. It's actually much easier for me to read writers I don't know through Twitter or some other social club.

In fact, some of the best reads I've ever had didn't come from sales pushes from writers. They came from other readers telling me, "Hey, have you read this yet? I know you said you like different stuff, and this was really different." So I go and read the book, and I find those recommendations from other readers who know my fictional tastes are generally more accurate than me just taking in books from writers who say "You might like this." Because really, most writers will say that to everyone.

But I don't do this. I know, I'm totally screwing this up, but my whole platform is, I'm writing books for the people who feel left out of the main market. So, by definition, I'm not going to appeal to a lot of people inside the main market. This is not to say I can't appeal to some of them. But I'm not going to sell a million copies of any of my books. And when I talk to people in chat, sometimes their comments about other books make me decide my books are not going to work with them. So I will say, "I don't think you should waste your money. If you feel this way about this style of book, then my stuff will probably disappoint you." Yeah, I'm like the anti-saleswoman now.

I guess I prefer reading strangers because when I post the review on a book I don't like, I don't have to deal with that writer on Twitter in other conversations. Most often, what happens after I give a bad review on someone's book is, they stop following me. Doesn't matter if I'd reviewed other books by them favorably or not. 2 stars="friendship over, biyatch". And maybe this is their version of "developing thick skin" by erasing any voices of discontent that don't agree that their work is super awesome.

Do I do the same thing? No. I'm still following the two reviewers whose reviews beat me up one side of the literary street and down the other. One day, I even hope to have them review other stories, should they ever get over their distaste of the previous stories they tried. (They didn't both hate the same book.)

BUT, I do have a lot of the same standards that other readers do. A couple of writers have pissed me off with something they said, and I won't read their stuff anymore. Neil would not approve, perhaps, but then Neil is one of those guys who I love his blog, and still haven't found a book of his that worked for me. I've still got others in the TBR pile, because I read his blog and respect his opinion. I also find myself often in agreement with his views on writing, so in theory I should like his stories. Yet I…just don't. So there stands a very good chance that, were I to go to Neil and ask him, "Oh, please, Mr. Gaiman, sir, read this book from me," he might end up hating it. And man, wouldn't that suck? Having Neil Gaiman read my stuff and go, "That was weaker than mouse farts." (;.;) Cause there's nowhere to go from there but "Thank you for trying it," or "Oh yeah? Well…your book wasn't hot either, buddy!"

And anyway, once I know writers on twitter, I'm also more reluctant to try pushing my titles on them individually, like, "Oh, you write horror? I have a horror book too (link)." It's for the same reason. I'd love for them to read it, sure, but I don't want to put them in that awkward situation of saying, "God, it was dreadful." I'm so reluctant to push that I'd prefer recommending someone else's book than my own.

I think this is why so many people are reluctant to read new stuff. Because it might suck. Not just a little, either. Reading it might suck all the joy out of you and leave only rage that begs the question, "Why the fuck did I just waste my time on this?" Then there's all the negative emotions that come with being denied the story one was hoping for. I get that. No, I mean, I get that frustrated feeling every time I put down a book early. I know what it feels like to be upset about books not going the way I'd hoped, and as I said in my last ramble, I get overly emotional about these things.

So, I guess where I'm concluding this is that we can all have a lot of the same behaviors and expectations in common. But we also have all these different ways of judging what is good or bad. It's not so easy to tell if you're going to like my stuff just because you agree or disagree with my personal opinions. In fact, it's likely that at least one opinion I hold will offend you. And it doesn't matter which one, my point is I would hope that you don't base your judgement of my art on my personal blog. If you read my art and think it sucks, I can't help that. But if you read my blog and say "Based on this, I know what your books will be like," no, you really don't. Does this mean you'll like them? No, not necessarily. But without trying some of my books, you can't say you know anything about my art just because you read my blog. It's like declaring you know what a band will sound like based on reading the guitarist's political blog.