Real Life Diagnostics: Would This Query Letter Make You Ask for Pages?

Critique By Janice Hardy, @Janice_Hardy

Real Life Diagnostics is a weekly column that studies a snippet of a work in progress for specific issues. Readers are encouraged to send in work with questions, and we diagnose it on the site. It’s part critique, part example, and designed to help the submitter as well as anyone else having a similar problem.

If you're interested in submitting to Real Life Diagnostics, please check out these guidelines.

Submissions currently in the queue: Four

Please Note: As of today, RLD slots are booked through November 17.

This week’s questions:

1. I am wondering if it is too familiar at the start. I am aiming this particular letter at a specific agent as you can see. I will amend the letter for other queries.

2. Am I using the correct format?

3. Is my plot clear enough?

4. Do you have any suggestions to make this query stand out?

Market/Genre: Query Letter

On to the diagnosis…

Continue ReadingWritten by Janice Hardy. Fiction-University.com