THE DIET TRAIL

     After a summer of partying it's time for Gerhardt and me to get serious about our eating habits. We look like Teletubbies.
     This whole diet thing is new territory for a man who's always been slender and could eat whatever he wanted. I'd dubbed him the two-legged locust. He would devour everything in his path... including my chocolate stash. Ah, but that has come to a screeching halt. The nightly binges on animal cookies and chocolate are at an end. Consuming a loaf of French bread single-handed over a two day span? Also gone.
     So, here's how a recent conversation went.
Me: "Fish and salad for dinner."
Gerhardt: "Yuck. What else can I have? Pretzels?"
Me: "No. Pretzels are carbs."
Gerhardt: "I suppose I can't have crackers."
Me: "No crackers."
But I did give him a little yogurt for dessert, to which he replied sarcastically, "Oh, goody."
Ten minutes later...
Gerhardt: "Where's the chocolate?"
     The diet trail is not for wimps.