Downsizing

Will Wonders Never Cease? The Beast Within Us

Downsizing

Right now I have a great thirst to experience as much as I can. Life is brief and the older I get, the more I realize how important it is to fully use the time I have. Frank feels the same way. We have a good partnership, though it didn’t just happen by itself. We fought hard to be with each other. We actually went through hell and back–I was incarcerated in a state hospital for the mentally challenged and the criminally insane for six months, I was forced to give up our first daughter for adoption, and was later disowned when I married him. But now we are in heaven. And our idea of heaven, these many years later, is to have a tiny, safe place somewhere in this world, where we can wake up, have a good breakfast, and spend the rest of the day becoming part of something new.

The Hovel from ‘Doomsday Book’

So, several days ago we were in England driving through the glorious emerald green Buckinghamshire countryside, just an hour from London. Our purpose was to see The Hovel, the very oldest thatched cottage in the UK, which, enticingly, is for sale. “The Hovel,” the estate agent, Lee, tells us, “is situated in a delightful village with a well reviewed gastro pub, and is so ancient it is mentioned in the Doomsday Book. But even so,” he assures us, “the property does have central heating and hot running water, plus a wood-burning stove.” We cautiously access the cottage over a narrow plank bridge underneath which a lovely brook flows. I take a tumble

Right where I took a tumble.

halfway over, but fortunately I land in a soft bog of moss and not in the water. Once I am upright and we are standing in front of this glorious little place with its quarter of an acre wraparound garden, our hearts leap with excitement. But to enter through the original timber front door we have to bend down. Twisted branches under the thatched roof, undulating oak beams and an exposed brick wall, are just part of this wonderful cottage’s charm, we see as we make our way around. Nevertheless, we are unable to stand, and as we go from each miniature room to the next–two bedrooms, a living room, and one bath–we are hardly ever able to stand at all. “Can we can learn to live like this?” we ask each other. “Because really it’s just what we have been praying for–a tiny, safe place, where we can wake up, have a good breakfast, and spend the rest of the day becoming part of something new.”

Lush, green Hudson Valley, in a flood zone

Two weeks before our visit to The Hovel we spotted online another glorious place in Tivoli, New York, just an hour and a half from New York City, in lush green Hudson Valley. Our real estate agent, Bill, explained it was well-priced, had a pond, a little forest, and recently had been renovated. And most importantly, the house was a modular, and was very small. We could, in fact, put other modular homes on the property and create a small compound for family if they chose to visit. Modular houses can be made to look quite charming with ivy and rose vines covering it, and shutters fixed to the windows, so we were excited. We knew the area, as our granddaughter, Martha, had

Irene and Riley, exhausted after tramping through the flood zone

spent four years at Bard Collage near there. And since our other granddaughter, Irene, and her girlfriend, Riley, had just graduated from Sarah Lawrence and were living close to the city–and we were far away in Los Angles–we asked them to drive up and explore the place for us. “It’s perfect,” they reported. “Except for one thing. It’s so wet here that we are up to our ankles in water.” It was then that we found out that the perfect little place, where we could wake up, have a good breakfast, and spend the rest of the day becoming part of something new, was actually in a flood zone.

It’s exciting to look for our ideal little place. We will be looking in Florida near our daughter, Kathy, the daughter who miraculously found us ten years ago, and wrote a book with me called Secret Storms: A Mother and Daughter, Lost then Found. Frank and I will also look in Mexico, where it is not only very affordable, but our son Frank Jr., and his family live.

Frank and I realize how important it is to use the time we have well. We are seizing our moments. We are bold and brave. As one of my favorite authors, John Banville, said, Take a few strands of real time and carry them with you, then like an oyster, create a pearl around them. Finding a tiny, safe place, where we can wake up, have a good breakfast, and spend the rest of the day becoming part of something new, is just around the corner. Downsizing, we are learning, is really rather electrifying. Maybe that accounts for the lightheaded giddy glow we are feeling inside.