We Don't Play Games

He had learned in the past four years to speak only when he knew that which he was speaking about.   Moreover, he had learned that silence can sometimes relax a listener into thinking that one might be intelligent.--Elizabeth Gilbert, THE SIGNATURE OF ALL THINGS
I was writing to Paloma on the very day she was writing me on August 12, 1992.  My words were few (on a postcard) but it’s the thought that counts (and I had recently sent a parcel of goodies).  She gave a somewhat complete update that was supposed to last until early 1993:
Le 8/12/92Dear Michael,Thank you for the T-shirts.  They will look good on our tan pretty soon.Our holidays are starting on Saturday, the 12th (until February the 15th, I think).   That’s pretty cool, isn’t it?  The 22nd of December we are leaving for MADRID, SPAIN for Christmas and New Year’s Eve with my dad and my mom (not at the same time, of course) and my brother Edouard (he is coming on the 30th from Albuquerque).  Louis is the only one who won’t be there.  He has to work.
We are coming back to Balaruc Les Bains on the 2nd of January and we are going to PARIS on the 4th and 5th.  Our plane will leave from PARIS to the REUNION ISLAND on the 7th.  We will be there on the 8th after a 14 hour flight (with one stop in DJIBOUTI).   We will stay there until the 11th and then we are taking another plane (for only about half an hour) to the MAURITIUS ISLAND.   We will stay on the island until February 4th, then back to the REUNION ISLAND and back to PARIS where we will stay a couple of days to see my brother, Louis.  My dad will take Jonathan to EURODISNEY.
How does it sound?   I’m pretty happy about our plans, especially given that our company paid for our plane ticket.   They owed us some money because of all the holidays and Sundays that we’ve worked.  So we made an agreement.   They say GOD made paradise by copying the MAURITIUS ISLAND.  It sounds like something I might like. I don’t know the serial you were telling me about called DARK SHADOWS.  I don’t think so, at least, since they change the titles often.  I don’t remember any serial with a vampire but we had THE ADDAMS FAMILY.
The French company that has pretty much always been growing is CLUB MED but I don’t know much about that.My relationship with Alexandre is going fine.  We will celebrate our 7th Anniversary in March.   Time flies!   We, of course, fight a lot.  I don’t think a relationship can be possible without fights…especially when we are together all day long.   So we argue a lot about work things.  We don’t always think the same way.  We scream a lot but that’s no big deal.   The last time was last week when he crashed our new car (nothing really important; they are fixing it at the garage now).  He came back home, screaming.   That’s what he does to avoid me from screaming at him.  I know him quite well.  We don’t play games with each other anymore but it is also exhausting.  
I think somewhere I have done it the right way.  I’ve enjoyed being single for a few years.   I’ve had a lot of fun but I was tired of my party life.  I’m happy now with my family.  The only thing I miss is going out with you.  We’ve had so much fun.
Thanksgiving is not celebrated at all in France.   French people don’t even know what it is.  I miss pumpkin pies.   We don’t have Halloween either but we have MARDI GRAS in February.   It’s kind of the same for kids but it’s not very celebrated.   We eat crepes.
I would love to go to NEW MEXICO.  I love Indian jewelry with turquoise but we didn’t choose to go there this year because my brother told me it’s really cold in the winter time.  We will try to go there when the weather is nice.   We don’t know when yet.  When we do go to Albuquerque we will probably go to Los Angeles to visit you, too.   The problem is Jonathan won’t be able to miss school anymore next year.
My dad did not move to MADRID.  He still lives in PARIS but he bought an apartment in MADRID and now that they are both retired they go there pretty often.  That’s where we stayed the last time we went to MADRID (2 years ago).   That’s where we’re going to stay this year.
You didn’t tell me that you have a nephew!  How could you forget that?  I bet you’re all very happy after all these girls.  I like the name DYLAN.  I think it sounds great.  In fact, I like names finishing in “AN”. 
What’s wrong with my age sweetheart?   Nothing!  I AM VERY YOUNG.   Why do you want to make me look younger than my age?  You know how young ‘34’ is, don’t you?   Just remember May 26this coming.  Also, just think about all the years of work left (almost the same amount of years that we’ve already lived.   I’m tired just thinking about that!
MERRY CHRISTMAS and HAPPY NEW YEAR…I don’t know what to send you.  I can’t think of something French you would like.   I could send you some perfume but I don’t know your taste.  It’s too difficult.  It is forbidden to send wine to the States.  I tried to send Bonnie some Champagne for her wedding.  So I’ll send you a T-shirt or something from PARIS or the MAURITIUS ISLAND.   This is our address in the MAURITIUS ISLAND (we are renting an apartment):Paloma Alquier c/o Dr. R Wong Sui ChongRoute RoyalePereybere, Grand BaieILE MAURICEDo be careful with the mail as it probably takes a while to get there.  You can just write to BALARUC LES BAINS.  I will find my mail when I come back.  I will send you some cards.Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to your family, too.Love You, PalomaI’m sending you a picture of me, trying on my new shoes.  Nice, aren’t they?
1900 Photo of THE CLIFF HOUSE and SEAL ROCKS, San Francisco
8-12-92Dear Paloma,Just a note to THANK YOU for thinking of me and sending me the knife.  I noticed the MICHAEL engraving, too.   Very nice!   I LOVE IT.  I haven’t priced around for 501 LEVI’s yet.  Of course, I will get you another pair.   What size do you wear now?   I’m sure it’s at least a 36 inch waist by now.  Ha-ha.  Just kidding.I’ll write again.Love, Michael
And then a stream of mail from Dorothy Rua arrived this week.  I will need to write back to her, too.
Postcard I:  TEARS Photo from 1933-1934 by MAN RAY
8-13-92Dear Michael,It’s nearly two weeks since your (our) visit.   It’s too long a time to let pass without a card.  I was really glad we were able to get together.  We should do it more than once every three years!   As I expected, you looked great and L.A. has not spoiled you (unless you know things I couldn’t pick up on, Ha-ha).   It’s just my “gut feeling” which I generally trust.
I was so intent on finding out more about the things going on in your life.  I forgot to share the info Tonee gave me about your friends at the SMART RESOURCE CENTER (Pac Bell Yellow Pages).   Do you remember Sheila Schultz?   Well, she requested and made a move from the so-called “sales” department to “customer service”.  She must have finally gotten fed up with all of those PAINTING CONTRACTORS showing up on the computer!On a sad note, Carol Eddy’s husband took his life and left her with three kids.   Since then, she met a guy who was separated from his wife (and not yet divorced).  Carol’s plan is to sell her home and use the money to finance his divorce!   So goes life at the SRC-SMART RESOURCE CENTER.
Postcard I: UNTITLED, 1981 Photo by JERRY N UELSMANN
8-15-92Well, as I mentioned while you were here.  I applied for a MARKETING POSITION with PTMS and finally got an interview this past Friday.  I felt good about it except that three days prior I learned that the Marketing Manager found someone (actually two people) with just the right qualifications and had already made up his mind on one of them.  He still had to go through the interviews though.  If nothing else, the process mobilized me and I’ve made the decision to actively search for a better job.  It’s so easy to allow yourself to stay in a rut.  Job opportunities are slim right now but nothing will happen for sure if I DO NOTHING.  We’ll see…Have they finished the new and improved work areas in your office yet?   If you’re allowed more privacy you’ll have to be more careful of those “RICH OLD LADIES” behind those walls.  Ha-ha.
Postcard III:  “My Swing Was The Highest Swing In The World.”
8-18-92The question is:   Will I ever get this in the mail? Friday evening, Rosemarie and I went to a movie and spent several hours at dinner, talking, laughing and talking and laughing some more.  We wanted to see PRELUDE TO A KISS but it wasn’t showing anywhere we wanted to go, so we ended up seeing SINGLE WHITE FEMALE.  It was okay but I thought it was a little too gory.  I got frustrated with the lead lady.  First, how could she ever trust her fiancé again after she found out about the ex-wife episode?   Second, she was way too naïve when it came to the roommate.  Have you seen the movie?   What did you think of it?I was going to ask where your next rip is, and then I remembered, you’re headed to New York City again for Labor Day, right?   One of these days you’re going to tell me you’ve accepted a job on the East Coast!   What a change that would be, huh?   Miss you…miss your cards.As Always, Love, Dorothy
And by the end of the week I had to laugh at the cheap CLARIDGE MOTOR INN postcard that former coworker, Reed Campbell, sent to me from RHINELANDER, Wisconsin (of all places):
8-17-92Hi Michael,Just a quick note…We are here for a family wedding and to celebrate our 25thAnniversary.    It’s been hectic and all I have to show for it is SORE FEET from dancing (and a very bad cold I picked up).  I will be home in San Francisco on the 18th, so if and when you get up to SF again let’s get together. Best, Always, Reed He inserted STRANGERS IN THE NIGHT into the cassette player, removed it and checked it for dust, then inserted it anew and clicked on the machine.“Yes,” he muttered, “indeed.”“I long ago learned that nothing really very interesting was going to happen to me, so I decided to spend time with people who interested me, and make money out of them.  My needs are simple:  Some good conversation, occasional sex, decent food.  That suffices.”--Joan Juliet Buck, THE ONLY PLACE TO BE