Why Homemaking Matters

When I was a girl in the midst of the feminist 1970s and 80s, my mother pooh-poohed homemaking. She kept a reasonably tidy house, but she was forever in a hurry to get the house cleaning done so she could do "important things" - like her job or her artwork. She never had me do chores - I rarely even pick up my own room until I reached my teens. She didn't see any value in home keeping and wanted "better" things for me.

This was a great disservice to me (even though I know she believed the opposite and was doing her best at the time). When I was a teen and she wanted me to start caring more for myself and my things, I didn't know how. No one ever taught me. Housekeeping was apparently something so ridiculously simple, I was supposed to just know how to do it.

Later, when I had a home of my own, I was still unprepared. Like my mother, I generally saw home keeping as a chore to get out of the way as soon as possible so I could do "more important" things. By then, I'd figured out - the hard way, through experimentation - how to do things like wash the dishes and vacuum reasonably well. But I still had a great deal to learn.

All this came to a head when children came into the picture. That added responsibility is what tipped the scales of my life into chaos. I didn't understand the foundations of home keeping, so I couldn't control my household.

I saw immediate negative effects. My house was a mess. The dirt and disorganization made me feel depressed. My husband - ever gentle when it came to criticizing me - began to complain some. Being in the house was stressful for him - and for me. And what was I teaching my children?

It was then I realized that the old ideas about home keeping - that it was an important job - were correct. The feminists were wrong. There was a reason the Bible held high the good home keeper - the Proverbs 31 woman. Her work - her job - made it possible for her and her family to thrive.

A Few Benefits of Good Home Keeping:* A restful home
* Less stress for everyone in the household
* A more peaceful family
* More money to spare for charities, savings, vacations, etc.
* The home maker develops useful business skills
* Saves times
* Makes it much easier to entertain
* Is one way to show our family we care about them

A Few Side Effects of Bad Home Keeping:* More stress for everyone in the household
* Less money to spare
* Inability to find things - and the frustration that accompanies this
* Time is easily wasted
* Makes it difficult and stressful to entertain
* Feels embarrassing and can lead to feelings of resentment in family members



In short, a woman who wants a restful home, a peaceful household, and more money to spend will take home keeping seriously. And while there are many things to learn about good home keeping, it's far from true that the good homemaker must wear herself out or spend all her time cooking and cleaning. In fact, one of the joys of keeping house well is that the home keeper will have more time for her family, her friends, charity, and her passions than the disorganized woman.

A version of this post originally appeared in Februrary of 2012.