My Bumpy Journey – Third Month (December) – Part 2
“Once you have seen and heard its tiny heartbeats, you can never unsee or unhear them. Once you have fallen in love with the tiny ball of life, you can never unlove it. You would strive hard to keep it safe, sound, happy and healthy. Even if something unfortunate is going to happen to it, it will always hold a special place in your heart. Such is the intensity of this true love.”
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Read the part 1 here: Third Month (December) Part 1
I am gonna address the unpleasant incident that gave this month the title of Almost Apocalyptic Month. After the Christmas weekend, I returned to work and had to face more pressure. I continued my prayers to Sai Baba to grant me a break. Midnight of December 26th, I woke up with unusual bouts of cough. The coughing continued throughout the night. I was also distressed that something untoward might happen to my baby due to my endless coughs. My sleep was disturbed and I decided to take an off the next day. The entire day was dotted with my sneezes and coughs. I was not supposed to take any antibiotics. So, I just gargled my throat with salt water (three to four times) and gulped a cough syrup which was at home. As a result, my coughs subsided towards bed time. But I just couldn’t bring myself to sleep. I tossed and turned and tried to find a comfortable position, but sleep evaded me. Around 3 AM, I couldn’t bear the insomnia and I started crying. I said to my husband, “How will I go to work tomorrow, if I don’t sleep? I have already taken an off. I should not miss work tomorrow.”
He pacified me by telling that I can sleep the next day and that he would speak to my branch manager. After much consoling, he plugged the earphones on to my ears and made me listen to FM radio. Since it was the wee hours of morning, there were melodious songs playing in it. I was gradually lulled to sleep. After a couple hours of uninterrupted sleep, I woke up, drank milk and slept again. Then I woke up for breakfast and slept again. The entire day I was so sluggish and slept at odd hours. Well, the next day I was up earlier than usual and got ready to go to work with a renewed zing. The day passed by peacefully, since it was the end of the month and there was not much work.
However, something strange happened in the evening. My lower abdomen felt heavy and I conveyed this to my mom. She was to leave to Bangalore for a get-together with her friends. When I told her of my condition, she got dead scared and replied that she would stay back. I firmly told her that she cannot miss her enjoyment just because of my condition. She admonished me and went ahead to unpack all her things. I cajoled her much and finally made her agree. My husband and I left for my grandparents’ home to stay overnight, while my mom went ahead to catch the train.
The next day (December 30th), I hired an Uber cab and went to work. Even as I travelled in the car, I felt uneasy. A queasy feeling climbed over me and many unpleasant things started bothering my mind. Though I engaged myself in work, I felt so lousy the entire day. Come 4 PM, I had this sudden pain in my pelvic region. It was like a gaseous pain and it was really unbearable. I told my colleague that I would be back in a minute. Then I went to the spare room, sat on a chair and began crying. I even mentally scolded myself that that pain was nothing compared to the labour pain which I would have in July 2018 (by the way, my due date is on July 18th). After a few minutes, I went back to my seat and began counting the deposited cash in my cash drawer (I should close all the cash transactions after 4 PM). And that’s when I felt a sudden gush of liquid out of my vagina. I knew it wasn’t the normal discharge which I would have. I rushed to the restroom and checked my pubic area by rubbing my fingers. To my horror, there was blood! What the hell! I was bleeding. How can I bleed when I was pregnant?
Tears streamed down from my eyes immediately. I went back to my place, conveyed the news to my colleague and asked her advice. Another female colleague from the Wealth Management department of my branch handed me a sanitary pad. I sobbed non-stop, as I used the pad and returned to my place. The imminent fear of losing my unborn baby was writ upon my face. My colleague consoled me by telling that bleeding during pregnancy is normal and that I shouldn’t panic. She helped me in finishing my work soon. Then I called up my husband and grandparents and told them that I would go to the hospital straightaway. I didn’t want to burden my mom with the news, as she would panic too much and her entire get-together would get spoiled. So I kept mum and boarded the cab to go to the hospital. The CIS-Bureau staff of my branch accompanied me. She was a kind lady, who kept assuaging me that nothing untoward can happen. But nothing went into my ears. I just kept chanting ‘Sai Ram, Sai Ram’. I was also hampered by the thought of how I would handle myself if I lose my unborn baby. 
