Quacks Pretend To Cure Other Men’s Disorders But Rarely Find A Cure For Their Own – Part Sixty Eight
Leo Minges and the Cartilage Company
I’m reasonably tall and as a consequence have not been prey to the inferiority complex and insecurities that are supposed to afflict our shorter brethren. Even if I was, I think I would resign myself to the height that nature bestowed upon me. But their shortness is such a psychological handicap for some that they would stop at nothing to gain those extra inches. And where there is a need, there is fertile ground for the purveyor of the art of quackery to exploit. One such was K Leo Minges.
A spate of adverts at the turn of the 20th century asked the pertinent if politically incorrect question; “Why remain short and stunted when you may learn free how to grow tall?” Reassuringly, the banner headlines went on to say, “No matter how short you are or what your age, you can increase your height.” Men and women under the age of fifty could expect to grow between two and five inches and those who had passed the magic age of half a century could still expect to increase their “height perceptibly” following Minges’ methodology.
The successful quack is never one to hide their light under a bushel and Minges was no exception to this adage. The advertising copy claimed that “Mr Minges is to short men and women what the great wizard, Edison, is to electricity,” no mean boast. Encouragingly, he “had gathered more information relative to bone, muscle and sinew than anyone else in existence.” Some people may do a spot of gardening for a hobby but for Minges this was all a bit too mundane. “Making people grow tall has been a hobby with Mr Minges for years,” the ad proclaims. One wonders how he got started. “The results he has accomplished,” it goes on, “are startling to a high degree” – well, a low degree would be no use, would it?
The advert then went out of its way to soothe any concerns. “There is no inconvenience, no drugs or medicines, no operation. Merely the application of a scientific principle in a perfectly hygienic and harmless way. Your most intimate friends need not know what your doing”, although they would, presumably, notice your increased stature. Sending your name and address to the Cartilage Company in Rochester, New York would secure you a copy of the instructional book, How to Grow Tall, a tall story if there ever was one.
If you were convinced by Minges’ expertise, track record and the words of wisdom to be found in the pages of his book, you could then buy his apparatus. It had the appearance of something from a medieval torturer’s tool kit or from the darker recesses of the world of sado-masochism. The user placed their feet in stirrups affixed to the floor and placed a harness on their head. A rope was then run via the harness to a pulley on the ceiling. Quite how you hid all this from your most intimate friends, God only knows.
Anyway, the user was invited to pull on the rope which would stretch their body. Quite how effective it was is anyone’s guess. Given the horrific dislocations regularly meted out by the torture rack, it is easy to imagine that over-enthusiastic use could lead to unforeseen injury.
It would be better to accept your height for what it is.
