In Others’ Words: The Illusion of Communication

 

Have you ever experienced this odd form of  communication where someone has a conversation with you — but forgot to include you in the exchange?

You know what I mean: It’s the kind of dialogue between you and someone else, but it takes place entirely in the other person’s head. Things are said — some of them supposedly by you. Conclusions are drawn — possibly after accusations have been tossed back and forth and most definitely when assumptions have been made.

An illusion of communication has occurred. And there are always, always actions and reactions based on this faulty form of verbal (mis)connection.

Of course, there can be a pretense of communication even when two people are face-to-face with one another. Maybe one person’s talking, talking, talking, but they’re not being heard. Why? Because the other person, rather than truly listening, is planning what they want to say next. Or maybe they’re just plain bored, ready to move on to something or someone, else. Conversation ends — but only an illusion of communication has taken place.

Communication requires intent — to care enough to be involved in talking and listening. It involves exchanging ideas, not just expounding your own. Sharing your feelings, which demands vulnerability. And none of this can take place behind the safety of a facade.

In Your Words: How do you avoid pretense or illusion in communication with others?

In Others' Words: The Illusion of Communication http://bit.ly/2HMs43L #relationships #quotes
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'The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.'
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