Social Isolation

Good morning and welcome to Friday Feelings. All month, we’re focusing on teens and the trials they face as they move toward being adults. Today, it’s all about school violence and exactly what everyone can do to curtail school violence.
One of the things all school shooters have in common is social isolation. Their social skills are limited or locked in an elementary or a middle school level. They truly don’t know how to navigate the turbulent waters of high school.
These students have never learned how to communicate with others on their level. They’re the quiet kid in the corner. The boy always trying to join the cool group of kids only to be rebuffed over and over again. These teens have a tendency to shy away from anything they perceive as being outright or forthcoming. They spend more time at home alone than they do interacting with their teens.
What changes them from the quiet kid that never participates into a violent individual determined to wreak havoc?
Like all teens, they want to be accepted for who they are. Unlike most teens, they have no idea how to do this. When they make the attempt to fit in, by emulating behavior they’ve seen, they’re awkward and are laughed at. That only pushes them further into their isolation, until they make the next attempt and are rebuffed. This cycle continues until they’re angry and ready to lash out.
The teen years are probably the toughest. In addition to their bodies changing sometimes overnight, they’re expected to become more mature instantly. Far too often, a parent will snap at them to act their age when they don’t have any idea how to do that.
These teens will crawl inside themselves, much like a turtle retreats inside its shell when threatened. They do feel threatened. No one understands them. Reliving the rejection makes them angry and as with all other teens, they want to get even. Because they have no real social compass, they react in ways they’ve seen others get attention—whether it be in school, on television, or in computer games. Most of those ways are inappropriate.
How do we cure this problem?
Learn that teens may draw back because of their sensitivity to social challenges or a fragile self-esteem. Show them how to develop a sense of belonging rather than telling them to get over it. By doing this, you’ll put these teens on the path to creating social and emotional well-being in addition to academic success.


About K.C. Sprayberry
Living a dream she’s had since she first discovered the magic of books. K.C. Sprayberry traveled the U.S. and Europe before finally settling in the mountains of Northwest Georgia. She’s been married to her soulmate for nearly a quarter of a century and they enjoy spoiling their grandchildren along with many other activities.
A multi-genre author, K.C. Sprayberry is always on the hunt for new stories. Inspiration strikes at the weirdest times and drives her to grab notebook and pen to jot down her ideas. Those close to her swear nothing or no one is safe if she’s smiling gently in a corner and watching those in the same room interact. Her observations have often given her ideas for her next story, set not only in the South but wherever the characters demand they settle.

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