Lashing Out

We all have our physical insecurities and my biggest one is the shade of gray/green color my skin turns when I have lost my summer tan. No offense Frankie Stein. I try self tanner but that gives me zits. I toy with the idea of a tanning bed but that gives me angst. I begin Googling last minute trips to Cabo and that depresses me because I can't just pick up and go. So what's a girl to do?

Well, if you're anything like me (impulsive, restless, and desperate for instant change) you drive to Costa Mesa in the middle of the day to get eyelash extensions from a girl, we'll call her N, on my friend's tennis team. Now, I am all for looking natural when going unnatural. And I stressed that as N taped my eyelids shut and my eyes began to tear (Kind of like barfing with your mouth closed). And N said she got it. I just wanted a little something to give my pale face and weakening ego a boost. Well, let's just say that when I sat up (two hours later) and N saw me, she giggled nervously.

"Wow, they are really long," she mused, like she hadn't been the one gluing for the last 120 minutes. Now that I think about it maybe she hadn't. My peepers were taped shut.

I reached for the hand mirror. I went from mascara to mascarry! I would have widened my eyes wide in horror but it was hard to lift my lids. I was about to lash out at N but realized that any time I do something unnatural to my appearance I run the risk of looking like a fun house version of myself. So I held my tongue (which was now shorter than my lashes) and booked to my car. I thought about freaking but instead I called my friend and cracked up. Will this stop me from messing with my looks every time I feel pale and insecure? No way. But it reminded me that it's risky. And if I'm not prepared to laugh I should think twice about doing anything at all.

So laugh it is. Feel free to join me. (notice the self-tanner zits?) 8 months until summer…

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TTYL

LISI XXXXX

HAPPY HALLOWEEN.