Letting go of holding on…

Breathing, blinking, and worrying come naturally to me. Whenever something new appears, I gasp, I blink, and I worry about all the things that can go wrong. When my kid mentioned that she signed up to run a 13-mile race, I signed up to worry. Would she finish the race? Would the weather be too hot and humid? What would she do if she needed to pee at mile eight? Would everyone be nice? Would her knee hurt? Would I be able to find enough chocolate to get me to the finish line?

On the day of the race, I realized I wasn’t the only one worrying. See all of those folks standing in the grass? They’re worried about all of those crazy people who are about to run a half-marathon. Stop the race! No running is necessary! I’VE GOT A CAR!

Despite my attempt to wrestle the whistle from the starter, the race began.

My worries sprinted along with the runners. Where was my kid? Was she drinking enough? Was she having fun? Did she avoid the swarm of mosquitos near the park bench? I swallowed one of those nasty little bugs by accident, and it tasted like sprained muscles and broken dreams.

And then I saw her.

I saw her numerous times. At mile two. Mile seven. Mile nine. And mile eleven. And every single time she trotted into view, her pace was a little slower. Her face was a little sweatier.  Her steps were a little shorter. I’d worried that she’d get tired, and suddenly I had proof that my worry was well-founded. But then I noticed something. Something profound. Every time I saw her, she was smiling. She smiled every step of that 13 mile race.

Smiling had never occurred to me. I was too busy worrying.

When she finished the race, she taught me a valuable lesson: amazing things can be done if you just try…and if you just smile.