Tales from the Land of Serenity Part 6

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‘Tales from the Land of Serenity’ came into being shortly after the horrific assassination of Daphne Caruana Galizia in Malta on 16th October 2017. A well-known investigative journalist, Daphne Caruana Galizia was blown up by a car bomb, minutes away from her home in Bidnija. The title of these stories derives from words spoken by the Maltese Prime Minister, Joseph Muscat, a few days after her murder: ‘When the MEPs visit Malta, they will do so with a sense of serenity…’

Sunday night settles in cosily, bringing to a close another uneventful weekend in this sweet Land of Serenity. Only a minor incident occurred on the even tinier and more serene – if that were possible – sister island of Gozo. A construction truck, plodding along with its daily motto of ‘Build! Build! Build!’, was so overladen with drills and scaffolding and other decorative items which add such an exquisite touch to the environment that the road beneath it quite gave way! Luckily, a passing crane which fortuitously just happened to be in the vicinity came to its rescue, ensuring that the vociferous construction work so enamoured in this land of serenity will not be halted and the mechanical soundtrack of this island will forever sing in tune.

 

Lest we forget, more news emerged in the small print of the widely read Government Gazette, stipulating that 2 out of the 4 members of the highly sensitive Monitoring Board for Detained Persons (or prisoners for the likes of me and you) have intimate political connections with the governing party in Serenity – not that being on the state payroll of the Minister for Police restricts your ability to ensure that government policy isn’t breaching the human rights of those prisoners so detained.

 

On the subject of crime, the citizens of Serenity and their leaders were deeply appalled to learn that a Prince no less and one once decorated with the Companion of Honour and the National Order of Merit – nay, the highest award bestowed on barrani by the Land of Serenity – had been thrown into a cell for committing corruption in his homeland of Saudi Arabia, a country renowned for its freedom of speech and liberal laws.

 

But hark! – there are signs of fever as the white-washed people of Serenity begin to kneel hungrily at the altar of their gods, genuflecting in a rabid orgy at the foot of that almighty washing machine spinning promises in the sky.

 

‘We worship you! We worship you!’ they murmur, repeatedly, devotedly, certain that their servitude will place diamonds in their chains.

 

‘Forgive me father, brother, godfather,’ they screamed, ‘for we have sinned!’ And this purgatorial howl of national confession caused not a tremor in the parliamentary walls.

 

‘We worship you, we idolise you, we adore your craven ways. We bow down, prostrate, we humble ourselves before you, proud to be your citizens, made in your own image.’

 

Meanwhile, a huddled group of dissidents, ousted from their serene community for making a mountain out of a molehill about the assassination of a journalist in broad daylight in their midst, stood outside the Police Headquarters where the very silent Police Commissioner lives, and hurled dangerous projectiles in the shape of paper planes. Grave concerns were expressed about the noise of this protest by residents who quite rightly wanted to maintain Serenity’s status as a country of silence, give or take the occasional interruption from a massive car bomb, exploding somewhere far away in the distant countryside.

Tales from the Land of Serenity have been made into podcasts, read and produced by Pia Zammit. They are published on  manueldelia.com

Tales from the Land of Serenity Part 6