Why the English Language Makes No Sense

Come on now. We’re all thinking it.

The English language is W.E.I.R.D.

Cough. Dough.

How. Low.

Meat. Great. Threat.

I mean, seriously. Right?

So, today, I wanna see just how much I can make your head spin. Though you might want to consider taking some aspirin first. Or a good, strong drink.

Ready?

Great.

Now, here’s why the English language makes no sense…

Because our spelling is confusing.

Consider this. If you took the rules of English spelling to heart and wanted to spell the word potato with those rules, this is what would happen:

If GH can stand for P as in ‘hiccough’,

If OUGH can stand for O as in ‘dough’,

If PHTH can stand for T as in ‘phthisis’,

If EIGH can stand for A as in ‘neighbor’,

If TTE can stand for T as in ‘gazette’,

If EAU can stand for O as in ‘plateau’,

Then the correct way to spell potato would be

GHOUGHPHTHEIGHTTEEAU

Because ‘that that’ should be a flaw:

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Because this (THIS!) makes sense:

“I never said she stole my money.”

Depending on which word you stress,

the sentence can have 7 different meanings.

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Because numbers are complicated:

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Because there’s no such thing as a rule unless you can break it:

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Because, on a final note, we’ll never be able to explain this:

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I wish I could take credit for this great content, but it was all pulled together by the wonderful folks at BuzzFeed. Got any good ones to add? I’d love to see ’em.

 Namaste 

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