A thoughtless moment

This is going to be quick and messy, because I have work to do, but I need to make a post.  (Normally, I strive to make anything I put online as clean as a published manuscript, because I think writers should not walk around in their underwear in public, but this is for a good cause, so let the typos fly.)

Saturday, I was on a panel at Rutgers One on One.  I usually do a decent job on these things, but I blew it with one question.  I was asked, "How do you show thoughts in fiction?"

My first reply was, "Italics," followed by a pause. (I'm all about timing.)  Then, I gave a bit more of an answer, some of which was okay, but most of which was not all that good.  I really did't give the person the answer he or she (questions were submitted ahead of time) deserved.  I think this was, in part, because the question required a bit of thought before I could really assemble my answer into something useful, and in part because there were five people on hte panel, and I didn't want to talk for too long.  But I can jabber as much as I want in this space.  So, while I won't address the entire topic, I hope I can at least come closer to providing something that might be a useful response.

In first person, you can show thoughts just like you show dialogue, in a variety of ways.

That martini might be poisonous, I thought.
I had a thought.  The martini might be poisonous.
A thought stopped me cold.  The martini might be poisonous.
A thought stopped me cold.  It might be poisonous.
(Note that the use of "it" makes this much more obviously an exact thought as opposed to something being related or described.  This is a good place for italics.)

There are endless ways to do this.  As always, the key is to find the phrasing that fits all the structure and needs of ther passage.  Terse, elaborate, frantic, sedate, whatever. 

In third person, it's pretty much the same, with tiny differences.

That martini might be poisonous, John thought.
John had a thought.  The martini might be poisonous.
A thought stopped John cold.  The martini might be poisonous.
A thought stopped John cold as he eyed the martini.  It might be poisonous.
(Note the addition of "martini" in the last example, to help anchor the pronoun.

Okay -- that's just a glancing blow at the topic, but it's definitley a much better job than my reply at the conference.