relationDips 1: e-whores

e-whore: a person who uses sex in some way to persuade men to pay money, or sign up for some online service. They usually target men.

One can see by how many of these fraudsters there are, either there is a lot of money to be made in this "industry", or all these dishonest and devious people involved in such exploits are stupid.

Truth be told there is no shortage of stupidity on both sides: victims and perpetrators. 

I understand why men get sucked in by these deceptions. I too have been sucked in. Eventually I worked out what was going on as I noticed certain commonalities among the women who followed me on Twitter, then said hello, then told me a bunch of lies before asking for money, usually in the form of an iTunes or Amazon gift card. Why they ask for those particular methods of payment is a still a mystery to me.

Fantasy plays a big part in this whole sorry business. E-whores appeal to weakness. By using flattery and provocative photos, they quickly catch the attention of many men, who will, despite knowing better in most cases, play the game. Why? Because the game meets a need.

The problem is that such frivolous and fraudulent encounters do nothing to satisfy deep emotional needs. This form of counterfeit intimacy is what Dr Allen Meyer calls "junk sex". In just the same way as junk food meets the immediate need of satisfying hunger, but leaves one soon disappointed and hungry, as well as malnourished, junk sex is a cheap substitute for real emotional intimacy.

Believe it or not men who indulge in this online behaviour are not primarily driven by a desire for sex. It's much more complicated than that.

If a man in your life is trapped in this roundabout of addictive behaviour, try to get him to talk about his motives, and show him mercy. Leave your judges cap in the closet. Most likely he doesn't like what he's doing either.

Real relationships, honest and transparent ones with genuine people, are real food for our souls. The search for intimacy continues...

NB: I usually include images in my posts, but for obvious reasons this time I did not.

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Published on March 23, 2018 00:59
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