Publishing versus the World

Today on Facebook I watched a video filmed by survivors of the school shooting in Dunblane, Scotland. They wanted to voice their support for the students here in the US who planned a mass walk-out to protest the lack of gun control. When I was in Edinburgh last week, the First Minister Nicola Sturgeon gave the keynote address and yet there were no metal detectors, guard dogs, or wands. We were asked to leave our coats and bags in the cloakroom (which was left unlocked), and then we filed upstairs to hear her speak humbly and passionately about the role books have played in her life. Sturgeon admitted she made a point of reading a few pages of a novel every night before bed because it helped her not to stress over the latest tweet that could end the world. It isn’t fun being from a country whose leader is ridiculed regularly, but it was a relief to be outside of the US for a few days. I’ve already looked into returning in May and would love to reconnect with the students and teachers I met. The publishing community—at least those attending the conference—seemed interested in inclusion strategies and appreciative of the work some publishers are already doing to better represent today’s Scotland. Could I see myself living there? I don’t know. On Wednesday I arrived at the hotel close to 1pm and headed out almost immediately to present at an elementary school in the same neighborhood. The next day I woke up and grabbed my bag of books and hopped on the tram, and it struck me that I can “do what I do” just about anywhere. In some ways that’s reassuring and in other ways…disconcerting. If I want to step out of my life for a while, does it make sense to cross the ocean and do what I’ve always done? On the plane ride home, between sneezes, I started writing two novels—one set in Edinburgh and the other in Glasgow. I didn’t see much of that city while I was there, but got a very warm welcome from grad students and faculty in the Education Dept. at the university. My host Eilzabeth Dulemba took this photo after our event ended (read her write-up here), and she kindly shared her own experience living as an expat in Scotland. I come from a family of migrants; I know there’s always a price to be paid when you trade one life for another, and I have no illusions about greener grass. But I do want a change of scene—or rather, a regularly changing scene—Paule Marshall’s transnational life to match her “tripartite self.” Connecting with kids of color in Edinburgh was wonderful, and I saw mythical beasts (like this unicorn) all around Old Town when I squeezed in an abbreviated walking tour before my panel on Friday afternoon. I guess my worry is that I’m too adaptable. If I can teach and write and give talks anywhere, then what does “home” really mean? Do I want to fit in or feel anonymous? I talked to my landlord about leaving by the end of the summer, and made a mental list of the furniture I’d sell rather than move. I’m keeping May open so I can maybe get back to Scotland and/or down to DC in order to tour the different neighborhoods. This weekend I’m seeing a friend who moved back to Canada after Trump was elected. Another friend studying in the UK is thinking of moving back to the US. We’re all searching for the right “fit.” I want a new challenge and a fresh start. But in order to earn a living, I need to build on the reputation I’ve built as an author/activist here in the US. One of the last questions on our “Publishing vs. the World” panel last week was, “What gives you hope?” And I told the audience about Njeri at Onyx Pages in Canada who discovered Mother of the Sea because of Jherane at Rebel Women Lit in Jamaica. Digital publishing allows stories to cross borders and oceans…no wall can stop us. And these amazing Black women are building inclusive, real and virtual communities of readers and writers. The day after I got back from Scotland I did this interview with Njeri. It’s an honor to having a reader/reviewer take you and your work seriously—not because you’ve won a big award or landed on the bestseller list, but because they trusted a fellow reader. I think my online community would mean even more if I did emigrate again. My entire Scotland trip was arranged through online outreach, and I’m so grateful that folks I’d never met before welcomed me into their schools, their campus, their conference. That truly is reassuring—there are good people everywhere.

Saw A Wrinkle in Time today but will have to blog about that later. Early morning school visit tomorrow so I’ll sign off for now. Nite!