An Off With No On Can Sure Dawn!

This post is so cool. So cool that you will drool. The drool may even freeze. May get stuck that way if you sneeze. Hold on, cool is hot? We are so cool then with our hot to trot.

A grand post.
Loved at each coast.
It let's me boast.
Humans I roast.

Not literally though.
That's a no no.
Cannibals aren't in right now.
Maybe next year they'll wow.

Back to great.
So great none can relate.
How do I know?
Because I'm not low.

Nope, I'm off the charts.
Me and my farts.
I'm off so swell.
Let's raise some Hell.

Really confused?
Now I'm amused.
I raised what you can't,
And went off something I was never on at my plant.

Even made me wordy.
Could flip me the birdie.
But that would be mean.
Not really, at my scene.

Because I'm off the charts.
In all your hearts.
Off what charts though?
Do charts even show?

Can I go off what's not there?
Does this mean I have a glitchy lair?
Does it go off your screen?
Bah, who cares, as off the charts is serene.

Even if I never got on.
Off sure did dawn.
Nope, not a con.
For I'm off with no on.

Are the charts small?
Damn it all.
Just go with it with me.
I'm off the charts at my sea.

Can you still see this post? Hmm guess I'm not off any charts at my coast. Maybe they let me back on for today. Are you off the charts at your bay? Which charts would they be? Are you as chart happy as me? At least they aren't pointy like being off the hook. That could stab you at your nook. Charts could give you a paper cut I suppose. Or the screen of death may strike a pose. Bah, enough with my question pass, for I'm an off the charts little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.