Reader Question: My Husband Isn’t Interested in Sex Anymore
Last week on the blog we dealt with some pretty big marriage issues–infidelity, how to talk to your kids when you’re having problems, and more. This week I actually want to talk about some practical ways to help when you’ve got some problems (namely, how to feel intimate when you’re making love again!). Too often sex is just sex; it’s not making love. And we’re going to look at some practical ways to see sex as an intimate thing and to enjoy it!
But before we do that, I’ve got a backlog of reader questions I need to answer, and so many of them relate to the same thing: what happens when the HUSBAND has the lower sex drive?
Usually we think of the wife as being the one who doesn’t want sex as much, but I actually get more questions about the opposite scenario, when the husband has stopped wanting sex. I’ve already written quite a bit about this, but it was a few years ago, so some of you may not have seen those posts.
When your husband isn’t interested in sex–a 4-part series that covers the causes of men’s low libido; what you can do when your husband isn’t interested; how to talk about it with him; and what to do if he’s withholding sex.
Do I have to live with a sexless marriage? A post for those of you whose husbands (or wives) never want sex at all
When you said no for years, and now your husband’s the one saying no! There’s another dynamic I see a lot, when women refused sex for years and then they realized that they’ve lost something important, so they try to restart their sex life. But now their husband isn’t interested! Here’s how to tackle that.
My husband never initiates sex!
So the posts are there! But it’s still the #1 question I get. So I’d like to share a few letters from readers, and then put it a few extra thoughts and point to the most relevant article. Here goes!
From Reader #1–We Have Small Kids and My Husband’s Sex Drive is Gone!
My husband & I celebrate our 11th wedding anniversary this Sat. We’ve been together for 16 years (high school sweethearts). We really struggled to wait till we were married. Now that we’re older & busy with kids, stressed with work it feels like we NEVER have sex. I’m kinda glad I at least got some then. I still plan to teach my kids to wait. But I wouldn’t want to wish on them our struggle. I’m always in the mood & hubby isn’t. I think he struggles with low testosterone. He was just more interested & able to be in the mood at 18, 20, etc than now at 32.
