Calling All Ameriminions!

What's this, you ask? A brand new Tom Percival cover for Book One? But why? Whatever could be going on?
Well, my loyal and grinning Minions, it's because of the response we've been getting from our American readers that we've decided to have another go in the States. You've all been spreading the word to such an astonishing degree that we figured we'd help you along by re-releasing the first trilogy in eBook format, all with brand new covers. In fact, to FURTHER aid you in your recruiting endeavours, the first book is FREE to download for the entire month of October. 
Because you're awesome. And so am I. 
To see what's happening, just go to www.skulduggerypleasant.com/promo/ind....
But hark! The news doesn't end there. We're also about to run a first-of-its-kind competition for my American Minions (Ameriminions?), and my American Minions ONLY. Let's face it, the poor dears have to go through an awful lot to keep up with Skulduggery, so they deserve a bit of special treatment every now and then...!
What does the winner get, you ask? Oh, nothin' much... just the brain-melting honour of a special Halloween short story being set in their home state, starring (and I know you've been missing her) Tanith Low, to be released free in time for October 31st.
And what KIND of competition is it, you're asking now? Why, it's the kind of competition in which you write the first line of the story, and I continue on from there. Simples! So it's up to you, my Ameriminions. It can be as spooky, as crazy, as scary, as funny, as weird or as atmospheric as you like. I've read all your posts, and so I like to think that I know each of you just a little bit, and I know for a fact that you're all, y'know, just a tad... UNUSUAL. Ahem. Oh, and naturally I'll need your permission to actually USE your first line, so at the start of every entry could you all write "I hereby give my Golden God, Derek Landy, full permission to take this line and incorporate it into his wonderful, wonderful story." 
And you had BETTER put that at the start of your entry, because if I find the PERFECT opening line that lends itself so much to a weird and spooky story, and then I realise that you didn't give me your permission to use it...? Why, I'd just have to hunt you down and kill you with a spoon. 
And this is all thanks to the reactions we've been getting from the Ameriminions, so thank you Kallista, Skyril and Mar Chu, and Skulgirl13 (A.K.A Deryn Mellifluous), and Saoirse Equus, and of course Thor, and Thalia, and Ann Marie, and Vivianna Spark, and not forgetting Alana Core, Jugglingpaynes, Laura, Valkyrie V., Tori, Skulduggery Skellington, or even Gwaila, Pandora Wakeshima, Ophelia, nights.raven, Arabella Valkyrie PleasantSparrow, Nicole, annaslanski, Naomi Wiflath, MooGirl XD, Bella Votolato/Valkyrie Cain, mmodrall, Artemis Shakora, Ven Curor, Minnie, Lois Lane, Another Individual, Deila, Thornton, legolas3, Anya, Captain Zombie, Lauren Longbottom, Idlewind, Hanna, Gwyneth Noire, Funk Tuba, Docktor,  Dantea William, Cat, Bekka, and last but not least- Andrew. 
Did I miss anyone? I bet I did. Dammit.
RULES:
You MUST give me your permission at the start of your entry! 
There is no limit on word count- it can be as long as you like, or as short, cutting and snappy as you like. But it must ONLY be one line! 
Competition closes on October 23rd. The winner will be announced soon after on this Blog. 
With your entry, please include your home State, not your town. Your State is all I need.
Each person is limited to FIVE entries each.
The short story, once it's finished, will be available to everyone, all around the world. Yippee! (Ahem.)


Anyway! That is the first of our Americaland competitions, and the second will be unveiled next week, with all sorts of goodies up for grabs. But for right now, for THIS competition, all I have to say to my Ameriminions is good luck, and don't be afraid to be different. Embrace your inner lunatic. Fun times guaranteed.