Real Life Diagnostics: Would You Keep Reading this YA Fantasy?

Critique By Janice Hardy, @Janice_Hardy

Real Life Diagnostics is a weekly column that studies a snippet of a work in progress for specific issues. Readers are encouraged to send in work with questions, and we diagnose it on the site. It’s part critique, part example, and designed to help the submitter as well as anyone else having a similar problem.

If you're interested in submitting to Real Life Diagnostics, please check out these guidelines.

Submissions currently in the queue: One 

Please Note: As of today, RLD slots are booked through January 6.

This week’s questions:

Does this opening work?

Are you lost or are you able to follow what's happening?

Do you get a sense of the kind of person the main character is?

Did you connect with her and care enough to keep reading?.

Does the scene grab your attention and make you want to know what happens next?

Market/Genre: Young Adult Fantasy (Contemporary/Urban)

On to the diagnosis…
Read more »Written by Janice Hardy. Fiction-University.com