Is it time for relationship housecleaning
When overwhelm comes to visit, my tendency is to clean off my plate. I do more than relationship housecleaning. For me cleaning my plate means, everything goes! When I need space, I need space. In the past it has often taken the form of breaking up with whomever I’m dating in the moment. It was easy to let go of relationships which were not a good fit. Time and again, I used overwhelm to test the boundaries. But not this time.
I Found A Balloon
My dad used to say that there are two kinds of people in this world – balloons and rocks. Rocks are the foundation, they are solid, steadfast and strong. Their rough edges can be polished and their tough exteriors can be cracked. People tend to turn to rocks when they are searching for stability and a way to be grounded. Typically, rocks are passive – they let everything wash over them. But in the grip of anger, rocks can deliver a crushing blow.
Balloons, on the other hand, let the wind carry them every which way and in directions they might not have envisioned. Their heads are in the clouds and they are flighty in nature. Balloons crave space, hemming them in creates static. Balloons see life as possibility, albeit many have a string attached.
My dad said I was a balloon. He advised me to find another balloon so that together we could explore and be adventurous, “Tie your strings together and off you go – you’ll end up exactly where you are supposed to be.” Balloons are happiest with other balloons just as rocks are happiest with other rocks. But, when we balloons feel insecure and tossed about by life, our inclination is to slow down. So, we tie ourselves to a rock. Opposites attract and all that.
It works until it doesn’t and when overwhelm rears it’s ugly little head, I’m the first to clip my string and move on. When being tied down suddenly becomes limiting, it becomes scarier than having to rely on my own resiliency. While too much going on at once can be exhilarating, it can also get crowded. And while rocks adapt themselves easily to overwhelm by piling more on, balloons can pop.
So, when the holidays came ‘round this year and my time got crunched with the addition of baking, shopping and parties; I could relax into the space created by being attached to another balloon. After all, he speaks my language.
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