me and the holidays (just a few small thoughts)

I dislike how parts of the holidays (especially the group celebration parts) sometimes feel like a big hectic frazzled rush fest. How can holidays be fun or relaxing or enjoyable when they're a group time-constraint affiliated stress test?
I never like it when someone goes to someone else's house for a holiday meal and/or to open gifts and then less than an hour after eating and/or unwrapping, they're out the door (to attend a different event with a different group or because of work related constraints or because of other time splits or whatever). 
What is the point of events that take a lot of advance planning and preparation, but then only last about an hour?
That's not my kind of celebration. My kind of celebration would be more personal and more connected - and I find it hard to connect in rushed, frenetic group scenes  (although I can sometimes enjoy them if they're not too hectic and last for several hours), and I find it even harder to connect when I don't even know what's going on in advance.
I sometimes wish someone would want to (and/or be able to) do something one on one with me for the holidays, or at least part of them.

Otherwise, the stress outweighs the enjoyment for me.