Please Pardon Me If I Don’t Follow You Back

This is something I’ve been thinking about for a while.

There’s this thing called “community.” It used to mean your neighbors, family, friends, and co-workers. Now it includes your contacts on Twitter, Instagram, WordPress.

As we venture forth online and build virtual communities — which then turn into very real communities — there are guidelines that develop regarding stuff like manners. One of these ideas is that when someone is nice enough to follow your site/handle/content, you should do the same for them, or at least pay their pages a few visits.

Now, in a lot of ways, I am one hundred percent behind this. I’ve met some wonderful people by doing so. However, lately, I kind of suck at visiting other people’s sites.

It isn’t intentionally mean-spirited. I’m not jealous if somebody else has 787,923 more subscribers than me. It’s not that I don’t support others’ endeavors.

No, there are very good reasons for me sliding into the woodwork of social media.

Number one: I AM BUSY. Yes, we’re all busy — we all have families/jobs/holidays coming up. But I am extra busy writing and publishing my own novels, doing all the marketing for these titles myself, and making sure my cat doesn’t destroy the world if his food dish is empty.

Number two: I have autism, and this means that time management and I have an ongoing rivalry. (Spoiler: Time usually wins.) I swear, I sit down at 8 a.m. to craft a blog post, and within 16 seconds, it’s noon, and the universe has had a good laugh at my expense. And there are still two loads of laundry to fold and put away, children to feed, library materials to return, and — worst of all — my tea has gone cold in the intervening period.

This definitely leaves a lot less wiggle room for reading 10 new blogs and scrolling through 35 follow suggestions on Twitter.

Number three: I am TIRED. All of this makes for a potentially hectic schedule as it is, and I am only human (sorry, no, it’s true) and I simply don’t have the capability to stay awake for 18 hours straight. Not even to check out somebody’s truly awesome reviews on Rick Riordan’s new series, or photos of their trip to Ireland.

I need to SLEEP. I need to RELAX. So that I can keep being amazing myself, and continue writing what will undoubtedly be the biggest bestselling fantasy YA series of the 21st century.

Number four: Now that I have added so much more to my life via self-publishing, something else has to go.

If you used to see me on your blog a lot, and suddenly realize it’s been a while, this is most likely why.

There are still many websites I have bookmarked or return to visit now and then — except my presence may remain anonymous, due to the fact I often have about 12 nanoseconds to do this, and then get back to editing/marketing/updating my own stuff.

If you do visit my sites (and please do, because I live to bring enlightening and enjoyable posts to your inbox/feed) and interact (leave a comment, retweet, etc.), I will make the effort to respond in some fashion.

I completely appreciate what the online world has done for bolstering my sales, my little fan base, and my confidence. So I won’t be one of those totally silent bloggers.

Number five: I’ve had to make some decisions about what I’ll be focusing on.

This means that my once-ideas of expanding my content to Tumblr or Blogspot, Instagram or Pinterest, are now moot. Dust in the wind. Kaput. They needed to be. If I spread myself too thin, I will quickly transform into a puddle of molten tears and burning hopes. Trust me, it ain’t worth it.

I cannot be everywhere at once, and I am okay with that.

It means I’ll put more effort into maintaining and growing my current platform.

And if our online paths don’t actually cross, though they may come very close, I want you to know that I wholeheartedly support your blogging/writing/taking photos/filming videos. You’re creative, you’re cool, you’re making a difference in somebody’s life.

Keep it up.