Ten Reasons Not To Write Your Novel

From The Huffington Post

Will Weaver Author, The Last Hunter: An American Family Album
Ten Reasons Not to Write Your Novel
Posted: 9/29/11 04:49 PM ET

1. Just because you speak English does not mean you can write English. Your boss is proof of that.

2. Someone has already written your novel, and better than you ever could. Certainly you've visited a bookstore, picked up a new release novel the plot summary of which filled you with loathing. "That's the idea I had," you mutter. See? What did I tell you?

3. And any way, the best novels are not about plot -- they're about good writing. Which you are not. That is to say, well, you get what I mean. I hope.

4. Writing a novel is way more work than you think (or remember if you've already written a novel). It's like building a house: you start with excavation and mud and rocks and groundwater you hadn't counted on, continue with dubious characters who seldom show up at the right time, nothing turns out exactly like you had in mind, everything is over budget, and it takes months if not years to finish, by which time you hate the place.

5. Instead of writing a novel, why not focus on, say, sex? Imagine that you give your wife, husband or partner the same amount of attention that you lavish on this, this idea -- these voices that you can't get out of your head. Imagine what perfection you would attain in the sack! Think of how heroic and loved you would be!

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