Everything I am but Better

Everything I am but Better
by Gabe Redel


I don’t know
if I am good enough for love.
If this thing
that everybody wants so ferociously
is worth the price,
then I might find that it is right for me.

Love is such a tight line to walk
that just one slip
and I know I will be sliced in half,
torn and bleeding from the accident.

I don’t see
the faults in myself.
It might be
that my faults are so great
that they are all I see
so I do not recognize them as traits
that shouldn’t be there.

Focus is not something
that I will keep
if I do not agree with her decisions.
I will lose my mind
and I will slip.

I have spent too many years
falling in love
with my own thoughts.

It is everything that I am
but better
that I know I need.
And that is not fair to her.

She would not be allowed
to be her own person.
She would have to be
what I want.

I need a time
to forget about myself.
I need her to make me want
to lose who I am
so that I can have what is worth the price.