forseeable

it’s an odd cocktail of a feeling, one i’m still digesting a week later, after the contact person of a series at lincoln center emailed me that she couldn’t imagine presenting me in the “forseeable future.” those words came after a compliment about my so-called creativity, and then closed with “thanks for your understanding,” as if i’d written a complaint to the cable company and not a concert proposal. i’ve performed professionally for about 20 years, and indeed most of my ideas meet rejection, but never once have i heard those words: “foreeable future.” forseeable as in like, as far as the eye can see? unimaginable? a friend told me i should be encouraged that she even wrote back. i wish she hadn’t.