An Open Letter to Jake Gyllenhaal

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Oh come on, how could I NOT stare?!

Dear Jake Gyllenhaal,

I'm sorry I stared at you while you were eating dinner at Angelica Kitchen, one of my favorite restaurants. I used to interview celebrities for a living, so I didn't think I'd turn into the starstruck type, but that's the level of charisma you're packing.

I only dared to stare because your back was to me so you probably didn't know, though I was staring so hard I'm surprised your neck didn't turn red and burn. I was eye-mugging you because it's a thrill to see someone whose work you admire–I've seen nearly all your movies and you have, on occasion, made me weep (especially in Donnie Darko and Brokeback Mountain).

And yes, I fully admit that I gave you the plate-sized eyes because–and I don't mean to objectify you in any way–you are hot. Or, as they say in Indiana, hawt. Hotter in person, even, than in movies. Which is not to say you're not hot on film.

And last, I stared because it's cool to see a hot actor you admire eating vegan food!! I'm glad to say I wasn't visually stalking you so much that I know what you were eating, but I hope you had some of the vegan chocolate cheesecake because it was a very happy experience.

But I apologize; staring is rude. And I swear I was not checking out The Angelica Home Kitchen cookbook just because it was tied to the hostess station right behind you. I really needed their corn bread recipe. (Yes, I bought the book.)

I'm sorry, Jake. But I can't promise I won't do it again.

xx,

S