Book Review: Man vs. Child, by Doug Moe
The real measure of a parenting book is not the answers it gives, but the questions it asks. Is its advice is drawn from experience, or from self-absorbed magical visions from the make-believe Land of Happy Parent Theories?
That’s why I am skeptical of the endlessly-published parenting books and blogs that ask questions like “What Are the Best BPA-Free Three-Syllable Strollers Under $1500?” and “What’s the One Weird Sure-fire Trick to Getting Your Child to Sleep Through the Night?” — and why I really liked Doug Moe’s Man vs. Child, which asks…
What’s good about sleep deprivation?
Is it OK to take my baby to a bar?
Should I worry if my kid talks weird?
Is my child too annoying for this restaurant?
What if I never get my iPad back?
Who is this tiny person?…and so much more. Subtitled One Dad’s Guide to the Weirdness of Parenting, it’s clear that Moe draws from personal experience and keen observations of other fathers and mothers. Raising a child in Brooklyn, New York — the heartland of organic free-range irony — offers Moe plenty of irreverent perspectives on the craziness of parenting, like the proper way to fold different brands of strollers. (Tip: it’s mostly it’s kicking, smashing, and probably swearing.)
Doug Moe is an actor and comedian (see: UCB, 30 Rock, Inside Amy Schumer, etc.) so it’s no surprise that his book offers plenty of laugh-out-loud moments. You might have noticed this if you followed his Tumblr, coincidentally also called Man vs. Child. But in the midst of the humor, Moe raises some honest parenting issues that no book pointed out before I became a father.
For example, in a section titled “Time to Decide About God,” Moe suggests that we examine the differences between our religious beliefs and those of our parents. Maybe your parents are hardcore Christians and you’re not. How will you handle popular secular/spiritual holidays like Christmas and Easter? Are your child’s grandparents going to be pushy about their beliefs? It might be time to figure out your religion so you can stick to it and raise your child appropriately. (Anyone who follows my blog knows where I’ve landed.)
If you need help resolving an uncertain faith, I think “man vs. God” describes an entire department at your local bookstore. However, don’t misunderstand Moe; he hasn’t figured it out yet either. “If you decide to do what’s right, not just what’s easy, then I congratulate you,” he writes. “Deciding what you actually believe is a tough task that I have been avoiding for years. Soul searching is hard, especially when you have a tiny baby screaming at you.”
To be clear, this book isn’t just about babies. It’s about that long-running game of life called So You Think You Can Dad. The book starts with observations from Moe’s childless stage of adulthood, and by the end of the book, his daughter is 10 years old, halfway between the ages of my own kids (8 and 12). That’s a long span to cover, and at under 200 pages, Moe’s book doesn’t even try to explain every detail, because that’s not the goal. You should wait for his 18-volume exhaustive treatise entitled Man vs. OMG Who Has Time To Read All These Parenting Books Anyways.
Instead, as he says in the introduction, “Man vs. Child is about the absurdity of being a dad today: from your blissful pre-baby days through when your kid is off at school, probably talking shit about you.” You might need a more serious parenting book to know the medical procedure for when your toddler eats gum off the sidewalk, but you should read Doug Moe’s book to know how to laugh about it. Remember, dads: safety first, but humor ought to be a close second, and Man vs. Child is an excellent reminder of that.
I am sure it is a random quirk of marketing fate that Moe’s book was released not long before Father’s Day (June 18). So, this year, if you’d like to buy a dad more than an ugly necktie, or something besides a new flashlight to replace the one your six-year-old dropped in the toilet, consider giving a copy of Man vs. Child. It’s available from Amazon and other places people can buy funny books.
Full disclosure: Doug Moe asked me to review his book and sent me a free copy. He’s also a friend of a friend. But I wouldn’t have read it if I didn’t expect it to be funny, and I wouldn’t have written this if I didn’t genuinely enjoy it. Plus, after 1500+ posts on And I’m the Dad, you would think I’d finally review a parenting book, eh? So here you go. Thanks for your patience.
A nice review of Man Vs. Child from the great dad blog And I’m the Dad! Thanks!
