i apologize….
Question: What is it like to be an author?
Answer: Isolating. Exhilarating. Absorbing. Depressing. Isolating. Urgent and pressured and stressful. Exciting. Terrifying. Profoundly saddening. Challenging. Isolating. Humbling. Amazing. ~ Tara K. Harper, Science Fiction Author.
thank you, tara. so i'm not going crazy. lol!
o.k., fam, i've finally gotten myself together enough to pen you this long overdue apology.
i don't know what i was thinking. writing my first novel, address: house of corrections? great idea. making my first novel, the beginning of a trilogy? wth! why no one slapped me upside the head, i don't know!
i saw a movie recently – the title escapes me now — but in it, the main female character was a new author, whose first book – though fabulous – went basically unnoticed. knee-deep in crippling writer's block, her former lover asked her why she wasn't writing another book. she answered and i'm paraphrasing…that she had lived with her first book her whole life, but her second book had her constipated.
what happened for the rest of the movie, i can't tell you. but that one conversation has been haunting me for days.
it all makes sense now. i've been stuck. but not just stuck, afraid. but not just afraid, discombobulated.
fam, i truly apologize. you've been very patient. and i should have completed the second installment of the trilogy – the mailman's daughter – by now.
but you see, this author's life is new to me. the life of a writer? that i know. but to be fair, my prior life as a scribe has always been fragmented.
as a spoken word artist, i got to perform and commune my fellow/sister poets.
as a playwright, i got to create characters and situations that i was blessed to see dramatized onstage.
as a journalist, i was forced out of my shyness and got to interview all types of interesting folks.
as a screenwriter/filmmaker, i got to create a world on paper and then collaborate with a team of artists to bring mine and others' vision to life on the screen.
and as an audio book producer, i got to direct a cast of hollywood's finest "unknown" actors for my audio series, address: house of corrections.
with each genre , i – a self-proclaimed loner – penned the words, but then created situations where i could interact and engage with others.
this gig as an author, though, is solely a solitary confined expedition that quite frankly, i wasn't expecting nor was prepared for…until now.
today, i say goodbye to the three p's – pooh poohing, procrastination and pussyfooting.
i've also rearranged and uncluttered my work space, redecorated our bathroom and bought a new welcome mat for our front door.
fam, i am ready to embrace my new life as an author and finish penning the mailman's daughter.
my only prayer is that you believe it's worth the wait. 
living by my pen…again,
monice
