The Romance of Body Language by Debralee Mede

A majority of communication is done in silence. Even if you know the smoothest of smooth-talkers or someone who can turn a phrase with the best of them, it is really the way he or she can raise their eyebrow, twitch their  lips or wink that will convey more than can be stated in one paragraph.  What is said is often very different from what is done and the romance of body language is the subtlest version of the language of love.  Years of research has gone into studying gestures especially in the enticing dance of courtship.  Here are just a few interesting ways that couples use this type of communication to inform someone else that they are interested.  There are many more that I'm sure that you can conjure them in your writer's minds.

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Unbroken eye contact between a couple in conversation or across the room indicates interest while continuing to hold that eye contact shows that the other person wants to hear more. A held gaze or staring at someone's lips is just another way of saying "I ready for that kiss handsome" or "Let's talk more so we can get to know each other better."  If, while in conversation, one attempts to match their speech to another's in tone, speed, and evenness, then they are trying to harmonize with their obvious love interest.  Other bodily expressions, like the tossing of hair especially that exposes bare skin combined with an even tone in her voice is a sign of a woman's deeper interest and are strong signals that this women is really trying to get a certain someone's attention.

When a woman thrusts her breasts forward or a man his chest he or she is engaging in signs of physical attraction and flirting; when either contracts the muscles of their chest or breasts they are not only displaying muscle tone and ampleness they are attempting to advertise their virility.  They are indicating to the other that they are the pictures of health, vitality, and strength and that they have the physical ability to sustain themselves sexually.

You may have noticed while at a bar or party that a woman appears to be inadvertently stroking her arms while speaking or listening to someone with whom she seems to be attracted. What she is likely communicating is: "I will be this gentle, tender and attentive to you later."  At the same time stroking objects like her wine glass rim is another kind of caressing display.  And that casual brushing-up against someone can often be more than just casual or accidental; it may be the next blooming romance to watch.  A person who is leaning his or her body towards another is likely saying 'I would like to be closer to you'. It can start with the head in a simple tilt or may the person may use the entire torso. This coupled with attentive listening shows that they are particularly interested in that person.

Lastly the dominant and secure person tends to stand with their feet pointed outward. Their energy is directed towards the world.  Less secure people who tend toward feelings of inferiority stand with their feet pointed inward, showing a desire to be out of the spotlight.

Learning to read body language can be a great help when determining who is interested in whom and more importantly how to display interest between characters. Reading body language can give an informed guess, but not exactly what somebody is thinking or feeling. Body language is one way that two can communicate their romantic desire and lustful intent.

Filed under: Body Language, Communication, Debralee Mede, romance