Signs & Symptoms of Reader Bipolar Disorder

Signs & Symptoms of Reader Bipolar Disorder
(An author's spin on Foxworthy's "You Might Be a Redneck")

If you rave about how much you loved a book, gush to the moon and back, then give it 2-3 stars...You might have Reader Bipolar Disorder.

If you pick apart a book and criticize it to death, claim you hate it with the fire of a thousand suns, then give it 5 stars...You might have Reader Bipolar Disorder.

If you've read every book on an author's backlist, continually buy all their new releases, but have yet to give any of the books more than 1-2 stars...You might have Reader Bipolar Disorder.

If you know you don't like a certain trope, read a book that clearly states in the blurb it has said trope in it, then complain in your review because of aforementioned trope...You might have Reader Bipolar Disorder.

If you dislike a specific sub-genre, read a book where it's apparent it's the sub-genre you dislike, then downgrade the book in your review because of said sub-genre...You might have Reader Bipolar Disorder.

If you write a review that has a character name, the setting, and/or a major plot point wrong, but insist you've read the book...You might have Reader Bipolar Disorder.

If you purposely seek out a book because you hate the cover model or heard rumors about the author, then slam the book with 1-stars without actually basing the review on the book itself...You might have Reader Bipolar Disorder.

If you say in your review you enjoyed the story and writing, then issue 2-3 stars because you don't like the cover font, the hero/heroine's hair color doesn't precisely match, and/or the cover background isn't to your version of an exact T...You might have Reader Bipolar Disorder.

If you criticize a book, stating in your review what you would've done had you written the book, when in fact you didn't write the book, and said review has no real bearing on the story...You might have Reader Bipolar Disorder.

Go forth and review responsibly, and happy reading! xo

Worldwide Star Rating System:
1★ = Hated the book. You want to give your mind a bleach bath.
2★ = Disliked the book. It wasn't for you.
3★ = Meh or Lukewarm. You neither hated nor loved it.
4★ = Liked the book a lot. It gave you warm fuzzies and followed you around like a lost puppy.
5★ = Loved the book. You want to hug it and squeeze it and pet it and call it George.

*Disclaimer: Reader Bipolar Disorder is not an actual condition. Post to be taken as humorously intended.