How Do You Struggle with Life?

I came to a jarring realization two days ago–a positive aspect of my DNA has become a negative. And I am struggling with life.

I have always loved to ponder about people and life. I have written about this before and I believe we must ponder (give consideration to, pray about) to love others well (our husband, children, friends). 

But pondering people and situations with optimism, reflection, and hope has turned to struggling with pessimism, panic, and despair. How did this happen? How do you...