Triskaidekafication

We go to America once a year, which adds up to a lot of trips. For the most part—despite the occasional hiccup—we have been lucky.
We have been lucky with the flights. But this time, both going and returning, our flights were missed, cancelled, delayed and just not very comfortable (in a first-world complaint sort of way).
Long story short: Missed connection in Newark, next flight cancelled, next flight delayed, and delayed, and delayed.
This would not have been so bad if we had not been in Ne...