Take It Inside!

Do you remember childhood days when you and your siblings or friends would get rowdy in the house and Mom would say, “Take it outside”? There were four of us kids less than six years apart so we could get out of hand whether we were playing or fighting. Out we would go until Mom let us come back in—typically after we had used up some of our abundant energy.

In ‘I Was a Yo-Yo Wife…Until I Learned THIS’ I have changed the metaphor to ‘take it inside’. If we understand that what we see externally is actually a reflection of our inner world, the place to let off steam is within.  I learned this lesson well in my second marriage.

Everything changes when we ‘take it inside’. Once our focus changes from ‘who can I blame’ to ‘what inside of me is triggering what’s playing out in my life’ we transform. There’s nothing like getting to the root cause and the root is always inside.

If you’ve read ‘Yo-Yo Wife’ you know how I learned THIS; you know that I practiced it for eight years before I wrote the book; and you know how instantly my marriage changed once I began to see my husband’s antics as a mirror reflecting something inside me that craved attention. That’s why I like to title radio or TV interviews, ‘How I Changed My Marriage in About a Minute’. Seriously, that’s all it took.

Last week I had the privilege of being on Wisconsin Public Radio with Larry Meiller. It was a talk show so we had some interesting dialogue with listeners. Imagine my delight when the first caller discussed exactly what my book explains—how everything settles down when we ‘take it inside’. No blame—just learning to love whatever old wound is screaming for our attention.

The next time your intimate partner triggers you, try taking it inside and watch what happens!

Vivian!

The post Take It Inside! appeared first on Vivian Probst.