Purr Empire Part Two Comes Out Of The Blue!

     I kept leading the way through the trees and I have to admit that it was a breeze. At least it was a breeze until the others chimed in. I guess I was taking them for a spin.
     "The fleabag is taking Drazin in circles. Why is Drazin following the fleabag anyway? Those animals screwed Drazin up." Drazin kept mumbling to himself as we saw a familiar hole. Hey, I had to go in the middle of our stroll.
     "Thy demon is right. We have been forsaken in the land of..."
     "Shut up, Pat. It's just a bunch of trees. Not some..."Cassie stopped yapping as shadows covered us all. They were smaller than her furry ball. That is a cat toy in case you don't know. No need for the gutter to show.
     "Humans have come into our den. We like to see such men. We will suck them dry. They will surely cry."
     The shadows grew closer an closer and kept repeating the same crap. Then we saw the things who continued to yap. They were tiny talking wood ticks. I think I would prefer super powered zombies hicks.
     "At least we know why the talking creatures didn't follow us," Pat blurted out, as his eyes rolled about.
    Those blood suckers had us all on edge. We could not even find a ledge. It was just a web of trees in every direction. We ran but had no time for further inspection. Those things were on us like a..well...tick to a rear. They surrounded us drawing ever so near.
     "Can't you burn them with your fake contact lenses, godly mook?"
     "Fleabag, if Drazin could don't you think Drazin would have already?"
     "Back foul creatures, back!" Pat waved a puny stick as their lips they began to lick.
     "A juicy meal for us all. We'll no longer allow you to stand tall."
     "Do you have to all talk at once and sound like that rhyming dunce?" Drazin questioned the wood tick crew, realizing a rhyme came due. "Drazin is so hating this world."
     Cassie and I clawed a few as they eyed us like yummy stew. We could not even dig into the ground. They were popping out of there as they continued to surround. They then hummed all in sync and each gave us a wink. It was strange to see. I swear they were like wood tick robots unable to talk free.
     "Not this again." Drazin grumbled and fell to his knees. Their singing once again made he and Pat freeze.
     Their legs reached out for each of them, mouths dripping with a little phlegm. Cassie and I continued to swat but it did not do a whole heck of a lot. We were going to be done in by blood sucking, singing wood ticks. That as an obituary title would sure get a few clicks. Then came a whistle and a whole new tune. The wood ticks quickly scurried away like a frightened racoon.
     "What foul creature saved thy, demon?"
     "How should Drazin know?"
     We all searched for the whistling nut. He was clearly in a rut. He was whistling the same tune over and over. I prayed it was not a rabies ridden rover. And then he came in view. He was a human, yet his skin was blue. He also had on only one shoe. He walked a bit lopsided as he stepped up to our crew.
    "You haven't seen a shoe around here anywhere, have you?" Blue Guy asked and glared. Did I mention he was spiky haired?
     "A shoe? Who gives a flying crap about a shoe? Drazin wants to know what you did to make those blood suckers go away."
     "Them? They're no trouble. They sucked on me a time or two and died from my blue blood. My bad reaction to their fixing human process gave me super powers. Now where is my shoe?" Blue Guy talked like it meant nothing at all that we were almost sucked dry like a shopper at the mall. I think he was a little touched in the head. But at least he saved us from winding up dead.
     "Let's get out of here before they come back," Cassie stated. Those blood suckers she really hated.
     "Drazin is with the fleabag. And you're coming with Drazin. How does Drazin get out of here?" Drazin questioned Blue Guy. He clearly did not get it on the first try.
     "Who is Drazin? Does he or she have my shoe?"
     "Good going, godly mook. You confused the poor, simple human." Cassie rolled her eyes. Blue Guy truly was not very wise.
     "Yes, dearie. He has your shoe. Would you kindly lead us out of here so we can show you where he is?" Pat said, sounding like some old lady. If he was not nuts, the cops may find his act shady. They would probably check him for drugged candy. But Blue Guy fell for it, so his crazy voice mind came in handy.
     "Sure. There is a way. You just have to walk backwards to go forwards." Blue Guy begin walking back. He laughed at the peering wood tick pack. Their faces sure were not vague. They stared at him like he carried the plague.
     "Let's give it a try. He looks like a trust worthy blue guy."
     "Drazin will strangle him if he is not."
     "The guy who has my shoe is mean. We have to stop such a crook."
     "Maybe you should stop talking, godly mook." Cassie laughed at Drazin. Blue Guy's mind may have been smaller than a raisin.
     We trotted backwards, watching each step. Blue Guy was the only one with any pep. The sticks had to hurt his foot with no shoe. He barely missed the hole where I buried my poo. That I just had to add. It is okay for some filler to be had. It beats saying we walked backwards for an hour and that Drazin and Pat smelled like they each needed a shower.
     "And here we are. Back safe and sound. Now where can I find Drazin to get my shoe?" Blue showed us the edge of the tree line. We peered out and saw that giant feline. They were all still there. We had to find a way to avoid their ear piercing blare.
     "That's Drazin. Right there! He stole your shoe," Drazin stated, pointing to Tig Leader.
     "I knew it. That is my shoe stealing foe. No wonder he is leader. He steals everyone's shoes." Blue Guy jumped into the lake and all the talking animals began to shake. They scattered as he neared their shore. I guess his powers from the allergic reaction must be more. But we did not stick around to find out when we spotted a singing trout.
     "I will have you all. Your reproducing will stall. We'll fix you good. Then humans no longer are understood."
     "Shut it." Cassie kicked dirt in the trout's face. That stopped his bad singing embrace. "Get going, you two."
     "Drazin needs earplugs."
     "And some real clothes, dearie," Pat added. His brain still in need of a cell that's padded.
     We ran down the shore line to get away. We could still hear the Blue Guy having his say. He was shouting about his shoe at every turn. That fire within for his shoe sure did burn. We thought we heard the last of him when our situation once again turned grim. We were back where we started. Blue Guy screaming for his shoe as all the talking animals had departed.
     "What is this place?" Drazin was clearly not impressed as this place had become quite the pest.
     "It's crazier than Pat and that is saying something."
     "Quiet or no dinner for you tonight, kitty cat." Pat threatened Cassie in a cheery tone. At least with all the voices in his head he is never alone.
     "Backwards with me. Let's go on three." I trotted backwards along the shore line and they all followed this rhyming feline. After a few minutes of walking and talking or moaning and droning, whatever the case may be, we no longer even saw a tree. Blue Guy's screaming about his shoe was gone and here we stood in an over grown lawn. There was a shabby shack at the back and we just knew we were in for more flack.

************************
That Blue Guy really wants his shoe. I wonder if he'll find it before this is through? Who knows how that will go. Who knows what the hell will show. I just hope Drazin or Pat doesn't get fixed. No brain cells would mean our feeding gets nixed. And so part two has come to pass from my ever so crazy little rhyming ass.

Experience spring, have a fling.
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Published on May 18, 2017 03:00
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