Laughing All The Way

Did you know,while he is growing up, it takes a Mother years and years,of careful manipulation to educate and raise a Son properly in this World.But,it will only take a girlfriend 30 seconds to make him stupid.
God,created the Heaven and the Earth.Everything else is made inChina!
What is an Astronaut's favorite part of a keyboard?The Space Bar!
 Women are like a new Computer Virus.They ENTER your life.SEARCH through your pockets.SHIFT your balance.CONTROL your life.And when you become an old version,DELETE you from the system.
I have been told,that if I keep drinking beer the way I do,I will become FAT!Beer doesn't make you Fat!It makes you LEAN.Up against tables, chairs, walls, and ugly people!
Two Irish Men were walking past a bar.I know,I can't believe it myself!
When you want to wake upLady Gagawhat do you do?Poker Face.
I asked my wife the other day,"What is your favorite book in the World?"She said,"Your checkbook."
What is green, rectangle, and has a head on it that drives Women wild?A Fifty Dollar Bill!
How do you know a Woman is about to say something intelligent?When she begins with,"A man once told me."
I have been called a Grouch by some people.Its not that I am Anti-Social.I'm just not user friendly!
This is,Me, Laughing All The Way To The Bank,Jim Hauenstein,
And,
“Live your Eyeliner, Breathe your Lipstick, and Kill for Each Other.”
- Lady Gaga -
That is my story and I am sticking with it!
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Knock knock.Who's there?Doctor.Doctor Who?