Goldfish are Stupid

Stupid fish, with stupid, pretty coloring.Stupid goldfish.
Three years ago, my oldest son “won” a goldfish at a local pecan festival.  It was one of those local Boy Scout booths where, if there’s no line, they’ll let you play until you do win.  Porter won pretty quickly, which meant that his younger brother, Tristan, had to win as well.
The Boy Scouts manning the booth were very cool, and very patient while my then 4-year-old tried and tried and tried to win the goldfish.  It was...