And, for the record…

I know that I've been angry a lot about the people who ain't doin' shit except taking up space, but I guess I do need sometimes to say, "I know not all of you are so messed up." It does bother me how many of you will engage me, but won't engage more hateful people with better resources. I'm a flat broke tranny, with issues. Hell, with subscriptions. I get up in the morning with a few million people hating me on general principle, and all it really takes is one blog post or hateful comment to set me off and ruin the rest of my day. But when I see fit to complain about my faction's particularly shitty hand, it isn't my enemies who show up to tell me how to speak or how to think.

There's a LOT of you who read and just walk on. And yeah, at times, even that bothers me. But it bothers me a lot less now. Because you could decide to say something spiteful, just to see if you could get another reaction. So, comparing trolls to lurkers, I'm finding myself preferring the lurkers more.

Some of you out there donate to charities, speak out on issues, write to your elected officials, and pat the heads of baby turtles as you block traffic and wait for the others to cross the road. Some of you put Mother Theresa to shame. (And recall, she asked for a pardon on a ponzi scheme criminal, without hearing any particulars of the case, simply because he'd let her ride in his private jet. His fleecing people for millions was a-okay, because it enabled her to jet-set to the world's poor for her photo ops.)

But I don't talk to you. Nothing I say on this blog is ever intended for you. Put bluntly, you're not my target audience. I really don't see a point in talking to you, or in praising what you do. What I do to help, I do in private. I don't do it for praise or an award, because doing good so you'll be recognized for it is not a healthy motivation. I've got good backup on this opinion from a former pastor named Jeshua.

I don't talk to you about doing more. You're doing more than enough. You're doing more than your fair share, and kudos to you for your hard work. If you're really doing the things you have to to make this world a better place, then please, ignore my rants and let them slide off you like rain off a slicker. These words aren't meant for you if you're doing all you can for your people and your world. They're meant for the people who do nothing, and constantly ask, "Hey, what do you want from me?" My rants are my answer to their question, whether they wanted a response or not.

But sometimes, I will try to remember the rest of you and point out, yes, I know some of you are trying. The problem is, it's not my job to keep track of what you're doing. My job is keeping tabs on the other guys. Which means my feed is often full of doom and gloom. I'm sorry for that. But it won't change because there does need to be an outlet for this stuff. Plus I'd rather deal with my rage issues here, so in my writing I can try to express some sense of hope even for the worst monsters in our society.

I know you genuinely good people are out there. But my blog is not for you, and I won't change it to suit your tastes. I'm sorry, but if you want something more positive from me, you have to buy a book.