Why the Patriots Won

Before the game, my friend and I broke a wishbone. We both made a wish, knowing that it was the same one (actually it wasn’t. He wished that the Falcons won, I wished that the Patriots lost). The wishbone snapped into three parts, leaving my piece and my friend’s piece the same size, slightly smaller than the third piece.

It was like we tried to fix fate, and the universe went “NOPE!”

I apologize to the entire world except for the Boston area, the small enclave where they don’t hate the Pats....