In Others’ Words: Courageous Boundaries

Your perspective of a boundary is determined by which side you’re on: the inside or the outside. And it goes without saying — but I’m saying it anyway — that your view of a boundary is also determined by whether you built the boundary (inside) or someone else did (outside).

Oftentimes we think boundaries are constructed out of fear. We build walls — real ones or virtual ones — to protect ourselves from attack. But a boundary as an act of courage? How can my establishing a boundary — this far and no farther — be seen as an act of bravery? Can it signify that I’m worth loving, worth defending … rather than being seen as an offensive maneuver against someone else, or retaliation against someone else’s actions?

We’re seen as courageous when we stand up for others. Why not call it bravery when we stand up for ourselves? When, in the words of my friend Wise Guy, we say, “I want a relationship with you — just not this one.” And we establish a boundary that protects ourselves and yes, in the process, very possibly disappoints others. They want unhindered access to us, to continue with the status quo. But boundaries are put in place for a reason. We can either please everyone else or be courageous and love ourselves, maintaining the needed boundary.

In Others’ Words: When has daring to set a boundary been an act of courage for you — choosing to love yourself? 

In Others’ Words: Courageous Boundaries https://ctt.ec/09Wqb+ #InOthersWords #quotes #boundaries @bethvogt

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“Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves …” @BreneBrown #quotes #bebrave @bethvogt

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