Even if you buy the "surgery" explanation, it doesn't redeem Mary
So let’s go through this.
Even if you buy the steaming pile of bullshit that is the surgery explanation (which I don’t, but I’ll meet you halfway here), it doesn’t make Mary a person who should be considered on the “side” of our protagonists.
Simply put, even if we believe that she didn’t mean to kill him there, she absolutely would’ve killed him later if he didn’t play along.
From the “Explanation”: “One precisely calculated shot to incapacitate me in the hope that it would buy you more time to negotiate my silence”
If we consider the surgery sparing his life, it was a conditional reprieve at best. It was conditional upon him playing along.
We see her find out he survived. Our reaction we get is shock, and once her face is hidden in the hug, the look of someone planning their next steps.
The next step is to lurk by a gravely injured man’s bedside and condescendingly threaten him not to out her.
Then, when he escapes the hospital, her next step is to go find him alone, threaten him again (how badly do you want to find out), and only seem to decide against killing him as an option when he points out she’d be caught.
She ultimately seems to play along. Because Sherlock, for some godforsaken reason (long game or a sense of fucked up obligation), decided to take her case and seemed to be playing nice. She lets him spin the story (never actually confirming it) and once they “decide to take her” she drops the threat (all while managing to never look remorseful for a damn thing)
Her behavior after the shot leads me to conclude that had Sherlock not played along, if the “negotiations to buy his silence” and had he not ensured that Mary could not kill him in the empty house without inconveniencing herself, there is nothing that would’ve stopped her from pulling that trigger.
***This isn’t even going into the fact that, even if true, the idea of mortally wounding someone to resolve the situation in the most convenient manner to you (she could’ve just knocked CAM out, but she needed to delay John too so she could escape) so your husband doesn’t find out about your criminal past is absolutely abhorrent.
So no. I don’t like her. I don’t forgive her. I don’t consider her part of the team. Even if this is the most emotionally unsatisfying writing in existence and I’m meant to think her actions were even close to justified, I’m going to recognize that the writers have made a stupid ass decision and be capable of independent thought. Because lying and manipulating the protagonists, putting one near death, showing no remorse, and allowing that same one to nearly go to his death because of your involvement is all while making zero contributions that help the protagonists is /not/ someone who is on their side. It’s someone who is using them.
Yup
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