The Dark Side of Testosterone

... is occasional utter rage and fury for no reason at all, or for a reason that would only cause most people to go "Dang it." Me, I get HULK SMASH KILL RAGE. I spent most of yesterday asleep in bed, having knocked myself out with benzodiazapenes in an effect to calm down and act like a decent human being. Today has been better, but there is still a definite undertone of "grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr beware of person do not approach." And I'm not even angry about anything -- I'm able to recognize it as pure hormones.

Well, at least I managed not to grievously injure Chris when he made reference to something happening "in a hot minute." He picks up all the latest stupid cool slang from his younger employees, and usually I can deal, but something about that particular phrase makes me want to RIP OFF HEADS REMOVE HEARTS EAT LIVERS DISMEMBER LIMBS SEVER EXTREMITIES BOWTIE INTESTINES ... er, I don't care for it, is what I mean to say.

The only thing that really gets me off the BLIND FURY track is sex. I feel like a living stereotype. Stone Age Man!

ETA: OK, I have to revise that last statement, because to shut down the rage monster, it's also pretty goddamn effective when your patient, sweet, amazingly kind husband SUDDENLY FROM OUT OF THE BLUE presents you with THE FOLLOWING FRAMED, HAND-SIGNED POSTER:



I'm still unable to articulate anything but "Buh?" and "OMG OMG OMG" and "I get to keep this?" and other similarly intelligent things.