Do Not Read

The world is just a great big onion but that’s not what makes me crywhen Ithink that if I eatchocolate, then there are consequences. I mean, eating choccy should be a pleasure rather than a cause of tears, not to mention a body that wobbles whenone jumps up and down in front of the mirror when clad in nothing more than a beret.

But enough of this maudlin stuff. What I really want to say is that I love you. Yes, you. You the person reading these words. How do I know that I love you? Well, you...